Category: Change

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365 Coaching Tips: 283rd, 284th & 285th

October 10th Coaching Tip: Embrace New People.

My mom and I enjoy going to watch the harness horse racing at Hoosier Park in the Fall. As a family, we have won some very big and important races over the last five to six decades. Even though she didn’t own any of the horses racing tonight, we decided to go again and she got 12 seats at three different tables in the clubhouse so that we all could watch the races and we kept a very close eye on my nephew, since he was racing in nearly every race. It was fun, great food, less stressful since we didn’t own any of the horses that were racing, and my nephew won two huge races; one was a longshot and I was screaming very loudly as he and his horse cruised down the final stretch to WIN!

Another treat on this night of racing was that I invited one of my IU women’s basketball teammates to sit with us and watch the races. She jumped at the opportunity to join us, and she convinced her sister and brother-in-law to drive to Hoosier Park and watch the races. I embraced them, sat with them, and really shared how to understand the racing program that helps them pick/bet/cheer for the horses. What a fun evening it was to watch them learn more about harness racing. Embrace others and share your love of something special. It’s good juice for everyone involved.

October 11th Coaching Tip: Memories Together.

My neighbor turned 59 today. His wife invited me over for a small gathering of their parents and sons…and me. Did I go? Heck yeah. His wife made all kinds of yummy homemade food, with a theme that focused on the Indiana University football game versus the Oregon Ducks. We devoured all of her goodies…and celebrated her husband’s 59th birthday with people that were closest to him. Help shine the light on others and make impactful memories together. His 59th birthday won’t be forgotten; homemade food, with family, and an IU upset road win over Oregon.

October 12th Coaching Tip: Sundays Are Rest Days.

Today was a day of rest, right out of the good words in the Bible. Rest for the week ahead of high stakes work in New York City with international leaders. We took it easy in the morning, read our Bibles, and listened to music. With the high stakes work ahead this coming week and to help keep up my overall wellness and resilience, it was important to prioritize rest today. I’m learning that in my 60’s now, business travel for me has to be a bit more planned. I need to thoughtfully move thru the week, but even more importantly, get hydrated and rest properly BEFORE I go on that business trip. My health has to be good and solid to help be fully present, helpful and purposeful for others as I coach them. Thus, today was a Sunday and Sundays are rest days, as requested by our dear Lord.

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365 Coaching Tips: 280th, 281st & 282nd

October 7th Coaching Tip: Listening? Put Your Phone Down.

When my partner and I are speaking, I find it VERY helpful to our conversations when I turn and look at her and really focus on her face, body language and what’s she’s saying and how’s she’s saying it, all while putting my phone down or pushing it away. I’m learning that this sends a clear signal that my partner matters, and it is a physical movement that I intentionally take that really reinforces that this conversation is of higher value than anything that could be on my phone. Put your phone down when you’re listening.

October 8th Coaching Tip: Call Ahead.

My mother does a great job of calling people and calling ahead. Why does she call? To get the results that she’s looking for. It works, because she is able to create a quick connection. She lets me know when she starts heading my way and then will let me know when she’s in the driveway. She will call her bestie/neighbor and let her know that she is going in to town, and ask if she needs anything. She will call the doctor’s office to see if anyone has cancelled or postponed an appointment, to see if she can get in earlier.

Pick up the phone and call ahead. It works, especially when you create a smile, embrace kindness and connection, with a results mindset.

October 9th Coaching Tip: Make It Look Pretty.

The contractors were pouring concrete today in front of the garage and front door at the house that we have been remodeling. Since I was at work and away, I talked to the guys in the morning and reinforced one thing: make it (the concrete) look pretty. Make it look just like your wife, with the one thing that would make her even prettier. They laughed and then said, “we got you, we understand.” I reinforced thru the word “pretty” that this was the first impression of the home: walking up the new concrete sidewalk to the front door and driving up to the new garage on the new concrete.

When I inspected the finished product this evening, I was so pleased with the quality of the concrete work. Indeed, it was pretty. Sometimes it’s HOW you communicate, and with WHAT metaphor, that helps get your point across and achieve the goals that you want.

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365 Coaching Tips: 277th, 278th & 279th

October 4th Coaching Tip: Full of games.

College football was in full swing this weekend. Lots of games, but for some reason, I kept a close eye on the Baylor game. Down by a bunch, the Baylor football team scored 18 points in the fourth quarter. And on the last play of the game, Baylor blocked a 37-yard punt that allowed the Bears to win the game by one point. Not a lot of commentary was heard about this game; neither team was ranked. However, WHAT AN EFFORT! The Baylor men never gave up…all the way down to the very last play. To win the game, they all knew they HAD to block the punt. In witnessing the replay of the blocked field goal, I noticed that not just one but multiple Baylor players jumped very high into the air to try to block the punt.

Although the day was full of games, it was the extraordinary effort by Baylor that captured my attention.

October 5th Coaching Tip: Patience Worked.

The hunt for frozen blueberries took us all over Michigan today. Although we had been in Michigan for three days, we had only been to one road-side market that had fresh blueberries. As those three days crept in to the fourth day, it was time to switch our hunt to frozen blueberries. And finally, at our last orchard stop, I walked in and went directly to the freezer area and boom, there were two bags of blueberries (2 x 10 lbs). Our patience worked out, especially after we pivoted and changed our search from fresh to frozen.

Be wise. Read the signals. Patience will be rewarded. It worked.

October 6th Coaching Tip: Go See Our Senior Seniors.

Over the past few days of traveling thru Michigan, we visited a 96-year-old uncle in Traverse City and another 81-year-old uncle near Detroit. With all the driving, traffic, hotels, etc., was it worth it? YES. We learned so much history from the 96-year-old about times during his childhood, while he was in the Navy, his work for the Michigan department of Natural Resources, etc. He forwarded photos to us for two days after our visit. He was thrilled that we cared about HIM. And my 81-year-old uncle reminded me that he was a good track and field athlete; he high jumped, ran the 440-yard sprint, ran cross country, and pole vaulted. He referenced 10′ 9″ multiple times, so I’m guessing that he pole vaulted that high. Amazing, that’s almost 2X’s my height.

Go see our senior seniors. I’m 61 years old and a “senior citizen” now. But I view the 60’s as the go-go decade, the 70’s as the slower-go decade, and the 80’s as the slow-go decade. The senior seniors aren’t “me”; they are older and ready to share their stories to those who care to listen. It’s an intentional and kind thing that one can do.

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365 Coaching Tips: 274th, 275th & 276th

October 1st Coaching Tip: Love me some Yankees.

When I was a kid, we used to watch the Major League Baseball playoffs at elementary and middle school and then watch more baseball games when we got home at night. That’s when I fell in love with the Yankees. A homerun king, Reggie Jackson, caught my attention by hitting three homeruns in one game. I was smitten! And since that evening as an eighth grader, I have been a Yankees fan. (On October 18, 1977, in the sixth game of the World Series against the Los Angeles Dodgers, New York Yankees outfielder Reggie Jackson hit three home runs in a row off of three consecutive pitches from three different pitchers.)

“Oh The Places You’ll Go” by Dr. Seuss reinforces how important it is to go see difference place. My recommendation is to expose your kids to winners, and losers, to new terrain, to new foods and new cities, etc. Oh the places that you will see as well. I’ve taken friends and family to the new and former Yankee Stadium. I was able to go to two games with my niece Katie and my nephew Kyle; niece Ally and I went to one game. Let’s Go Yankees!

October 2nd Coaching Tip: Get To Your Destination.

Today starts a 5-day vacation. We are making our annual Fall trek to Michigan. We both have family and stories from Michigan, so we enjoy wandering thru MI in the Fall, stopping at farm stands, taking in the views of barns, wineries, orchards, farms, lakes, etc. We made the decision to be on the road (with three stops) nearly 6.5 hours to get to Traverse City. On the way, we stopped at a road-side farm stand and I bought one apple, small jar of local jam, local potato chips, and a pint of blueberries for $2. Yes, just $2!

Our goal was to get to our destination, so that we can truly enjoy our short stay up north, visit with some family, and see more sights. Today, we head to a town that we’ve never been to before: Charlevoix, MI. Can’t wait. Get to your destination!

October 3rd Coaching Tip: Communicate Clearly.

At 8:15am this morning, an electrician called me from one of my house projects (and we were eight hours away in Michigan). After a quick and thankful greeting, “happy Friday, thanks for calling me first thing in the morning”, we got to work. By communicating clearly what I needed worked on in three locations in the garage, outside, and in a barn, we were able to be on the same page. I then called my contractor, and he indicated he would be there in a few minutes. Why did I call the contractor? Because I spent a few minutes with him a couple days ago explaining what I needed the electrician to do. We three were all on the same page, because I had taken the time to 1) clearly identify what I wanted, 2) told my contractor in advance, too, and 3) told the electrician and also asked him for feedback.

A few minutes after the electrician and the contractor spoke, the electrician called me back and gave me an idea that would save me money and save him time and be just as effective. Communicate clearly…and let people know that you truly want their ideas and feedback. It works!

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365 Coaching Tips: 271st, 272nd & 273rd

September 28th Coaching Tip: Pray.

Yesterday during the fourth quarter of Indiana’s road game at Iowa, IU’s quarterback walked out on the field with approximately two minutes remaining, and he quickly prayed. (It was a pressured packed moment. The game was tied, 13-13, after Iowa had just missed a field goal.) I noticed it and I was glad that the TV cameras caught the moment. A few plays later, the IU QB thru a rocket of a pass (with eight Iowa defenders rushing him) to his receiver, who ran straight to the end zone. As soon as the receiver crossed the endzone for the touchdown, the IU QB purposefully prayed again.

When the pressure is high or when you are hurting or need extra help, pray. Just pray.

September 29th Coaching Tip: Find The Positive.

Lots of people around us right now are negative. Negative about life, politics, fairness, etc. Meanwhile, I’m choosing to be aware of the negativity, and embracing the positive side of life. For example, I woke up this morning, read my devotionals, took a shower, drove my car, got a haircut, worked at a consistent pace all day helping others, celebrated a colleague’s retirement, learned from others, took some training, went on a walk, talked with my mom and partner, and am looking forward to tomorrow. That’s a good day, full of positive vibes.

Did I climb a mountain? No. Did I win the lottery? Nope. Did I solve brain cancer? Absolutely not. But I had a full day. I’m embracing what is good and positive. Are there bad things happening? Yes, every single day. I’m very aware of it; two mass shootings yesterday by former USA Marines. Government shutdown is a potential this week. Our human brains are not taking the time to read about nor understand history, which may indicate that bad things from the past may indeed happen again. Find the positive, be aware of your surroundings and make the choice not to focus on only the negativity.

September 30th Coaching Tip: Quarter End Results.

It’s that time once again, the end of another quarter. What are you most excited about for the future quarter and 2026? What are you most proud of that you have accomplished in the last three months? What got in the way of achieving a goal? How do you reset for this next quarter? What will you celebrate and who will you celebrate it with?

As I reflect on these questions, I’m most excited about picking up new coaching clients and traveling to Michigan and Naples, FL. I’m most proud of maintaining my coaching workload and picking up new clients from two colleagues who retired recently. Yes, I did get that darn cold in mid-September, which set me back two to three weeks on my fitness and ability to attend some fun events. With this quarter ending, my resetting is in motion; we are planning travel, warm weather fun times in Naples, an early Thanksgiving, a couple work trips and a strong focus on staying healthy. Soon we will celebrate with one of our neighbors, as she is working on her PhD; and we will celebrate my accomplishments at the National Senior Games in basketball shooting and sprinting. Those are my quarter-end results and reflections.

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365 Coaching Tips: 265th, 266th & 267th

September 22 Coaching Tip: Stuck? Change It Up.

Numerous coaching sessions are about my clients being “stuck”. They are doing ok, but they seem to be stuck and not really growing but not losing business either. Most times I will ask them, “when you have been stuck in the past and what did you do?” I ask those two questions to get them thinking positively about a time when they became unstuck and progressed forward. They usually share that they changed things up a bit, i.e. they hired a coach, they changed their office and included a dashboard somewhere, they created a competition on their team to reward the new behavior, they took a vacation and came back with clear thoughts, etc. Bottom line, they changed things up a bit.

It happened to me recently. I was stuck on a design project; I kept going and doing the same thing for 2-3 weeks. Then I did something totally different, really got feedback, and changed my thinking. I’m already feeling the new feeling, and it’s invigorating.

September 23 Coaching Tip: Turn Them Loose.

Talked to a couple of my coaching clients recently about their experience with their interns this summer. They both were absolutely blown away by how thorough and helpful these interns were for their teams. Both leaders mentioned that these interns were professional, got projects done quicker than the team expected they would get them completed, and that they asked for more work that could truly help the team and the clients.

In my experience of leading interns since our group hired 100-200 interns/year when I was at Caterpillar in the 1990’s-2000’s, we found that if you give them big projects, get them to critically think about the potential results, learn how to go ask questions from experts, and grow from feedback, they were quite valuable “part-time hires.” Some of our high school interns would work for us their junior and senior years in high school and then would add another three to four more internships while they were in junior college or college. By the time these interns were graduating from college, they were very familiar with many of the facilities, the processes and systems, numerous employees, the work culture, and the performance expectations.

If you have interns, give them direction and projects, and turn them loose. They’ll get stuff done for you quicker that you had imagined.

September 24 Coaching Tip: Get Both Sides of the Story.

Ever have someone call you and said that, “you said this, you said that…” and yet they have never talked to you nor asked you what you actually said? That happened to me recently by a leader. This leader launched into what I did, without remaining curious, and never asked me for my input on what I did. So being the wiser of the two, I chose to listen to them opine on what I did…then I calmly summarized what they said, and then clearly slowed down and said the following, “now that I think I understand what you are saying, let me tell you what I actually did.” It was interesting how what this leader had heard was very different than what I did and said.

As a leader, it’s your responsibility to 1) support your people, and 2) get their side of the story. Don’t just think what someone else says is correct and accurate.

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365 Coaching Tips: 268th, 269th & 270th

September 25 Coaching Tip: Drink Water.

I’m now on week two of this lingering cough from the cold that I had last week. I’m noticing that my body is working overtime still; my heart rate is a bit elevated and my energy is a bit lower than usual. Thus, I’m really focusing on drinking alot. Water, vitamin water, hot tea with honey, tonic water. Drinking water keeps you hydrated and in my lil ole opinion, keeping me moving and a-grooving, living and a-loving!

September 26 Coaching Tip: Open the Windows.

It’s truly beautiful Fall weather, dropping in to the 50’s over night and rising to the 80’s during the afternoon. Because of my cold, I’m intentionally opening the windows to help with my sleeping and to also “air out” the house from all of my coughing.

Soon it will be late Fall and colder, with no real opportunity to open the windows. Open up the windows, let the stink out, and the fresh air in.

September 27 Coaching Tip: Get Some Sunshine.

I’ve been intentionally getting outside to walk slowly in the sun, to catch some normal Vitamin D. Walking is free and the best exercise for nearly everyone. And sunshine is free, too. Why not combine them both, as I recover from this cold and cough, and do things that are healthy and free. Get outside and get some sunshine! It’s healthy and superb for your long-term wellness.

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365 Coaching Tip: 259th, 260th & 261st

September 16, 2025 Coaching Tip: Sick? Stay Home.

A group of 12 of us friends gathered over the previous weekend. We are all now in our 60’s. One of the 12 (who is a non-practicing MD) showed up and had a very evident cough. We all mentioned our concern and she kept indicating that she wasn’t sick, that the coughing was due to her asthma. We all knew better and tried to keep our distance from her. Throughout the weekend, I kept my distance, even sitting at the dining room table or going outside for frequent walks or going downstairs to just get away. However, she kept coughing and didn’t care how it might impact us.

Fast forward to this morning…seven of the 11 are now sick with sore throats and coughs. Seven of us, in our 60’s, are now sick due to a non-practicing MD who brought in her crud, coughed frequently around us, and then that spread quickly across our group of friends. Obviously, what’s done is done. Her lack of awareness and empathy for us is deeply concerning. Stay home if you’re sick.

September 17, 2025 Coaching Tip: Stay Home, Rest, Hydrate.

We all tell others to rest up and hydrate, get your vitamin C, blah blah blah. But, when you get sick, do you do that? Indeed, I did do that today. I worked 1/2 day at home, drank a lot of water and hot tea with honey, took 1500mg of Vit C, went on a couple, short, outdoor walks to get some fresh air and Vit D, and yes, took a nap.

Follow your own advice that you give others; when you’re sick, stay home, rest, hydrate.

September 18, 2025 Coaching Tip: Remember Anniversaries.

Again, a pro-tip is to use your iPhone or whatever calendar system you have to never miss key dates like birthdays, holidays, anniversaries, etc. Today was my brother and his wife’s 43rd anniversary. It’s not just another day; it’s THEIR day. I reached out to them both; had an important text exchange with my sis-in-law and reached out to my brother, offering to send them some treats or dinner. They had already beat me to the punch, and my brother had picked up dinner and brought it home for them to enjoy. He appreciated my offer. Remember others; they’ll appreciate it.

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365 Coaching Tips: 262nd, 263rd and 264th

September 19th Coaching Tip: Keep The Faith.

Let’s go down history lane for some context regarding what has been happening recently.

On 8/21/1960, my parents were married and by 7/4/1961 and 11/8/1962, they were the proud parents of two young boys. During the Fall 1963, my mother (Barb) tragically lost her dad to a heart attack. A month later, the President of the USA (JFK) was assassinated. Mom and Dad maintained hope and pressed forward thru those two deaths and had me on 8/22/1964. I’m so grateful that they were resilient and pressed forward with optimism about growing and raising their family. By 1968, more political strife happened with both Martin Luther King, Jr. and Robert Kennedy being assassinated. Three behemoths were murdered as my parents were raising their young family. And my mother lost her dad, knowing that he would never spend time with us as we grew up.

In the early 1970’s, the Vice President of the USA (Spiro Agnew) resigned in Oct. 1973 from his VP role due to a variety of problems. Keeping up hope, my grandmother (Bernice) and her gal pals went to the January 20, 1973, Presidential Inauguration for President Nixon. By that next summer, President Nixon was being investigated, and he also ultimately resigned in Aug. 1974

During that same timeframe, my mother was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. Not knowing how MS would impact our young family, my dad realized he needed to be much more available to help raise us kids and work at home on the farm, so he bought 20 horses and started his hall of fame career in harness racing. He raised, bred, trained, raced, owned, and sold 100’s of harness horses until the day he died in 2023.

Keep the faith, people, keep the faith. Just about the time we think we are the only ones going thru something horrible or depressing, step back, pray, reflect, and look at history. We humans have a tendency to repeat our same sins over and over. Keep the faith.

September 20th Coaching Tip: Provide A Moment.

It’s Dad’s weekend at Indiana University. Although I would LOVE to go to the highly anticipated game (#9 Illinois versus #19 Indiana at 730pm E), I’m making the decision to rest some more, so that I can keep on enjoying this Fall weather even more.

I have two great tickets, and one of my cousins let me know that her girlfriend and dad (at IU) needed two tickets. I quickly made the decision to sell them for $100/each, knowing this was a moment for this father-daughter combo. A memory they both will never forget. It’s a perfect autumn day on IU’s campus, warm weather, and an evening game with two ranked opponents. Doesn’t get much better than that. I’m glad to help provide this moment to them while watching the game on TV and resting.

September 21st Coaching Tip: Sort!

Today was a day to sort thru someone else’s stuff. I had waited over 10 months to do this, and today I needed some natural movement exercise without doing too much (since I’m recovering from a cold). I gave myself two hours to do the sorting, and I got to work. Piles for 1) trash, 2) Goodwill donations, 3) keep and utilize, and 4) pickup by others. By the end of the two hours, I was pleased to find a few items that I can utilize. In the evening, I took a carload of items to Goodwill. I still have a pile of trash, and we will get too that over the next month. I need to make a call to an organization who will come on site and remove it for free.

My tip for anyone is to set an amount of time and SORT. You’ll be glad you did. I think people can delay this important sorting due to emotional ties and memories to the things; when your head is clear and ready, set a timer and SORT.

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365 Coaching Tips: 253rd, 254th & 255th

September 10th Coaching Tip: Slow to Anger.

Children in America are threatened weekly with some type of gun violence at school. Today, as I was walking into the break room at work, I noticed that the news was on the TV; the breaking headline was that a prominent and young public figure with millions of followers had been assassinated with a single gunshot. It stopped me in my tracks; I was thinking, “not again…more gun violence during the daytime”. By the time I got home after work and then relaxed in the evening, I was noticing the amount of anger due to this specific assassination was at a very high and intense rate on social media and TV media. The anger was like an inferno. As I laid it down that evening, I prayed for peace, kindness, and understanding. I prayed for our nation to heal and see just how costly gun violence is in our communities and to our overall well-being. I then prayed for wisdom, asking for help to be slow to anger.

September 11th Coaching Tip: Never Forget. Never.

Yesterday, I was stopped in my tracks as I went to the break room with the horrific news of an assassination of a young leader. And 24 years ago, on 9/11/2001, I was on a short walk from one conference room to the next at a facility in Mossville, IL (That was during my Caterpillar Inc. career). I turned my head to see what the breaking news was on the TV’s in our cafeteria; then I noticed that a small group was gathered around the TV’s and someone mentioned that a plane flew into the World Trace Center Towers in NYC. It didn’t feel right at all; nothing about it felt right. Learning just a bit more from the news, I then pivoted out of the cafeteria and headed back to my office. What would I do in a tense moment like this, as a new and young leader, leading a huge $20mil project with about 100 teammates. Timeliness, communication and understanding were going to be critical. A couple of us jumped up on a table in the middle of our large group, gave everyone a quick update on what was happening in NYC, and then we offered the rest of the day off to everyone on our team. (We already knew that this airplane going into the Towers in NYC was terrorism; it was NOT a mistake.)

As I drove home, I stopped at the grocery store quickly and bought two things: peanut butter and water. I knew that IF we all had to buckle down and stay home for a while, I could live on water and PB. I will never ever forget where I was and how I felt that day on 9/11/2001. Fast forward 24 years later, now I work for Merrill Lynch and ML lost employees that horrible day in NYC. Never Forget. Never.

September 12th Coaching Tip: Travel With Your Friends.

My bestie (Kim) and I jumped in the car together and headed north to be with our Indiana University women’s basketball teammates from our Big Ten Championship season in 1983. Some of our teammates got together in early April in Tampa for the women’s Final Four; now this weekend is in southwest Michigan, steps away from Lake Michigan. Kim and I were in the car together for nearly three hours of drive time. Then we all had lunch and walked to grab some ice cream. With our tummies full and then on a complete ice cream/sugar high, I went for a walk to see the neighborhood and check out the access to the Lake Michigan beaches that were nearby. The next day had us getting up slowly, with a light rain, to enjoy a full breakfast together at the large dining room table. Once the rain cleared, six of us piled into one vehicle and we shopped at two farm stands and one Swedish bakery. My goodness did we ever have a blast buying fresh and incredible food. And on and on the fun times continued. Came back to chili being made and served with a “chili toppings bar”. College football games were on, and then it was another sit-down dinner made by my bestie; she roasted over 10 veggies, of all colors. It was a beautiful display of food and friendship at that dinner table that evening. Travel with your friends! Make those memories. Even cooking and eating together are times well spent.