Category: Kindness

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365 Coaching Tips: 208th, 209th and 210th

July 27th Coaching Tip: Make It Work.

We are on our way from Indiana to Des Moines, Iowa, for the 2025 National Senior Games. As we prepared our trip, we really didn’t want to drive 7-8 hours in one day. To make it all work, I reached out to some of my gal pals in Illinois and we gathered for a homemade two-hour dinner at Molly’s home. Little did two of us know that one of our gal pals had some serious info to share with us. She shared some gut-wrenching news, we listened, and that’s what we do as friends: we got thru it all together tonight. We four have been thru the rigors of life these last two decades together of being friends. We’ve lost husbands, homes, and jobs; helped our kids beat addictions and making poor decisions, rebuilt our brands and legacies, finished half marathons, etc.

We made it work today for this quick but important homemade dinner and meaningful conversation; please, make it work. Squeeze in these types of important visits. My partner and I stayed overnight and slept on their couches in their basement. The other two gals said, “wait, wait, tonight was so much fun. We want to do a sleep over soon.” I know you’re all very busy, but make it work.

July 28th Coaching Tip: Heat Dome Dangers.

When there’s a heat dome, hydrate. Whatever amount that you are drinking, keep drinking. This heat dome is scary stuff and it is hitting millions of Americans as we head in to the last week of July. We were driving on the interstate for over 3.5 hours today, and we kept the speed closer to 72mph. Why? To help keep the tires just a lil bit less hot (so that they don’t split or shred) and to keep a very close eye on the road surface itself. We heard that in Peoria, IL, a section of the interstate had “bubbled up” and had created a very unsafe bump on the highway. Imagine hitting that bump doing 85 mph! That could potentially wreck-up your car, then you’re alongside the road in the hot sun with a heat index of 100-110. Another tip is to grab a gallon of water and put it in your car. You just never know when you may need a drink or need to drench your head on days like these. Be aware and be proactive when heat dome dangers are present.

July 29th Coaching Tip: Six Seconds Faster.

My first event today at my first-ever National Senior Games here in Des Moines, Iowa, was the 400m run. My previous times in the 400m at the Indiana Senior Games were 1:47 (June 2024) and 1:43 (June 2025). Today, my goal was to run 1:40; I even dreamed about it. As I lined up today, I got dry mouthed/thirsty and nervous but kept my legs moving. Once the gun went off, the anxiety quickly disappeared as I stood in my starting lane two. My pace was spot on; I finished my first 100m before my count of 18 (which is approx. 25 seconds), so I knew I was off to a good start in this 400m race. Plus, I had already passed someone in the first turn. Then, the second 100m was just fine, and I appreciated the strangers cheering for me along the backstretch. In the third turn, I quit counting and focused on two things: the gal in front of me in lane four and on my running form. I set my eye site on her and got back up “on my tip toes” and started chasing her down as we came down the final stretch. I happily finished third in my heat, with a 1 minute 37.51 second time. I was thrilled to beat my goal of 1:40, and very happy that I finished six seconds faster that I ran at the Indiana Games on June 8, 2025.

How did I do this? Prayer and also practicing differently. The last six weeks, I have been running one-minute sprints, that are a jog for the first 30 seconds, then faster and faster the remaining 30 seconds. I would do this for two minutes, too. Lastly, I worked on my form and improving it. I’m so excited that I went six seconds faster! (Note: showing up, staying in shape, allowing your body to rest, eliminating injuries is a big part of participating. Of the 31 registered runners in the 400m, 18 showed up. I finished 12th!)

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365 Coaching Tips: 190th, 191st & 192nd

July 9th Coaching Tip: Summer Camp Safety.

Today, the women’s basketball league, WNBA, is broadcasting games in the middle of the day to attract the eyes of young campers on the fast growing and exciting game of women’s basketball. It’s a great way to give the camp counselors a break; it also allows the campers to have a safe break in the afternoon to watch women professional athletes play at the highest level. It’s also a great way to take a break from the potentially hot summer afternoon and improve summer camp safety for the kiddos just a little bit.

Congrats to the WNBA for hosting and broadcasting these games to get new eyes on the game. Thank you to the summer camps for allowing the campers to take a break and witness excellence. Summer camp safety is now at an all-time high, since the horrible flash flooding that has taken the lives of nearly 300 during the early morning of July 4th in the Texas Hill Country.

July 10th Coaching Tip: You Get An A+.

Today was my annual, osteoporosis check up with my female nurse practitioner. My vitals were great, my bloodwork was very good, by vitamin D and calcium were good, too. The NP checked my strength and reflexes; she looked at me and said that I was her strongest osteoporosis patient. She also took time to thoroughly review what vitamins that I’m taking; we made a couple slight adjustments, since both my calcium and vitamin D are at good and normal levels. Those two are important when treating osteoporosis, as well as walking, balance exercises and strength training. She gave me an A+ for my continual focus on my wellness. You only get one shot at life and only one body; as Warren Buffet says, “might as well invest in your body like it’s the most important thing you got…because it is.”

July 11th Coaching Tip: Fridays in the Summer.

Although I had a number of coaching sessions scheduled virtually throughout this Friday via a “Zoom”, I let all of my coaching clients know that I was available to talk via phone earlier than our scheduled time. What made me do that? It’s Friday and the summertime, and many people in numerous industries are heading to their lake home/camp/second home/lake/vacation. Me reaching out to these colleagues increases our trust, because they quickly realized that I understood the important of their Friday timing and yet I kept their request for time to discuss an important item. Be aware of what your clients are doing and how they spend their time; Fridays in the summer are sacred to many as “quality of life” days.

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365 Coaching Tips: 187th, 188th and 189th

July 6th Coaching Tip: Weather Smart.

It was 5:47pm, still hot and steamy, so I decided to walk over to get an indoor workout in before heading out for a sunset cruise around 8:30pm. After my workout at 6:30pm, I walked out of the health club and noticed that the weather had changed dramatically. It stopped me, and I turned around and looked west and saw very dark clouds that were spooky looking. In one minute, I made the decision to cancel the sunset boat cruise. We called both of the couples who were going to drive about 1/2 hour to get to us. Sure enough, by 7:15pm the rain, thunder, and lightening started and it didn’t stop for three hours. Be smart. Be weather aware. Take precautions about where you are and where others are. I did NOT want our friends driving in bad weather; I wanted them to remain near or in their own homes, safe and sound. Be weather smart.

NOTE: I am deeply grieving today for the loss of now 81 people due to the flash flooding in the Texas Hill Country. Little girls and their camp counselors were swept away in a flood that raised 30 feet in less than an hour.

July 7th Coaching Tip: Stay Present.

In my last coaching session of the day, I was virtually meeting with a colleague in San Antonio, TX. Instead of jumping right in to “the work stuff”, something told me to slow down and ask the difficult question: “Mike, were you impacted by the flash floods in TX over the weekend?” Yes, he was. He shared with me that he had a friend’s daughter who had died (a camp counselor), a niece who was rescued and he shared what this lil 10-year-old girl witnessed as she was being rescued by a military helicopter. He shared which kids didn’t go to camp this past weekend but were planning to go in a few weeks. I asked a couple questions, so that I could pray for people by name. Mike admitted he was a mess, did not come on the virtual call at first and then later in our conversation he did turn on his video. He thanked me for staying present, asking how he was and grateful that I asked for their names to pray for them. It was the least I could do. Being and staying present is the best gift that one can give to someone else during times like these. Stay present. (Grateful for all those who responded to help with the recovery of this tragic disaster.)

Note: Since my line of coaching work has me coaching colleagues and leaders from all over the country and some from around the world, I make it a priority to be aware of what’s happening in their area and then slowing down to connect with them, instead of jumping right into the work.

July 8th Coaching Tip: Birthday Calls.

It was 8:45am E/7:45am C, and yes, it was time to call one of my gal pals and wish her a happy birthday today. We talked for about 10-15 minutes and are planning to have dinner together later in July. Make the call for birthdays; it’s so easy to just text or send a Facebook message. Phone calls matter today; they send a different vibe, much like a hand-written card or note. Although it takes a few more minutes, relationships matter so make those minutes count. Make birthday calls.

Note: I’m so thankful that my iPhone allows me to put in annual repeating reminders like key birthdays and anniversaries. When I looked at my schedule for today, there was Molly’s birthday at 7:00am. Use technology to intentionally help you stay connected with your favorite people. Friends are good for your overall wellness.

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365 Coaching Tips: 184th, 185th & 186th

July 3rd Coaching Tip: Be a Favorite Customer.

As our friends and family were prepping for the upcoming long July 4th weekend, we decided that we wanted some healthy Mediterranean food. I raised my hand to cater in some yummy gyro meat, salad, rice, hummus, sauces, and pita bread. At 3pm today, I called my favorite Med restaurant, verbally told them what I wanted, and they said, “we’ve already started your order; it’ll be ready in 15 minutes.” I got there in 22 minutes, walked in, the owner greeted me, I paid them, and he told all of his workers, “she is one of the best and favorite customers.” (He trusted me last August 2024 and catered my birthday party for over 100 people. Plus, we go there every couple weeks for carry out.) After I paid, he asked where I parked, then he and another employee carried out the trays of food, put them in my car, and smiled as they walked back into their restaurant. Be a favorite customer.

July 4th Coaching Tip: Laugh Alot With Friends.

Friends, fireworks, fun, freedom and family! It’s what July 4th is all about here in the USA. Today we celebrated my oldest brother’s (Brett) 64th birthday; we had nearly the entire family there, except for one niece and her man. Mom and her seven great grandkids were there, and all adults in between, to celebrate Brett at my other brother (Grant) and his wife’s lake home. It was the first time that the entire family got to hang out at this new “lake home” family destination.

Throughout the entire day, we also had friends at our lake condo, just a few miles away from my brother’s lake place. Our friends were enjoying the lake views, kayaking, swimming, eating, chatting it up, etc. Before the end of the evening and the fireworks, did we ever have some stories? We poured a beverage and walked up the stairs to our friends’ condo directly above us to watch the fireworks, as they were popping up from multiple locations. It was easy to watch and also spectacular. Then we sat on their back deck laughing our heads off until well after midnight. One of my friends named herself the “camp counselor” for the day; that will be her new nickname as we all head into our Golden Girls years together. Laugh a lot with your friends; we have been thru some stuff together these last couple years, and we know that we’re all in for a lot more challenges. Keep laughing with your friends to maintain your wellness.

July 5th Coaching Tip: Heavenly Sent.

The Punkin Vine Fair in Kentland, IN, is something that my family and I have been going to since the 1970’s. Today, I intentionally joined my mom at the Fair as we helped organize the fun during the 13 harness horse races; it’s our job to get the audience involved. We interview them and the Fair queen, we recognize the oldest and youngest fans, we allow everyone to put their name in a bucket each race to select the horse they think will win, and then we pick one winner, give out small gift bags and tickets to other Fair events.

To our surprise, the Fair Board agreed to have the second annual Lynn Wilfong Memorial Race. How exciting, because we were not expecting it. My brother (Brett) brought a horse to race, and by golly, it was in the LW Memorial Race. And what do you know, Brett’s horse was in second the entire race, then came roaring down the final stretch to win the race. It was a magical moment, my mom was shaking and my brother was smiling. We got the win, and we all realized that this day was heavenly sent. I’m so glad that I was there for this magical moment.

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365 Coaching Tips: 175th, 176th and 177th

June 24th Coaching Tip: Review Expenses Quarterly.

Take time quarterly or at least every six months to review all of your expenses. This one habit, done every 90 days, will help you manage your budget and may free up a bit of cash that was once unavailable. For example, I noticed that my ATT internet rate jumped from $50/mo to $70/mo. And another subscription jumped from $10 to $20/mo. As I investigated other options, I realized that I could get 3X’s faster internet service for $50/mo for up to three years AND it lowered my iPhone mobile bill by $10/mo, too. I made the switch over a couple months. Question is: was it worth it? Yes it was. $30/mo is saved over a three year period for my internet and iPhone, and the other subscription will save me $10mo/, which equals $1,440 over three years. Plus, I have much better and faster service.

If you found nearly $1,500 laying on the ground, I’m confident you would quickly grab it. It took a couple phone calls, approx. two hours of my time on these phone calls and then self-installing the new internet. Check those expenses quarterly to understand your budget. It’s like paying yourself.

June 25th Coaching Tip: Embrace Cancellations.

What the heck does embrace cancellations mean? When I have a coaching appointment that postpones or cancels, I embrace that opportunity of 30-60 minutes to get work done that had been getting pushed back. For example, I had a list of over 25 colleagues to reach out to who wanted coaching. Because I had a couple cancellations today, I was able to focus on those 25 people and reach out to them. The targeted effort worked, and many of the 25 responded quickly to set up time in July. Embrace cancellations; it can lead to other opportunities to help and coach others.

June 26th Coaching Tip: Coach or Consult.

There is a clear difference between coaching and consulting. Coaching is viewing your client/colleague as an equal partner, and with the right questions, truly believes that they do have the answers. These answers can many times be brought out of the client by the coach remaining present and curious, asking thoughtful questions. Consulting is listening and learning and then leaning in to giving advice and recommendations. Knowing the difference as a coach is important for me and my clients. Many times during the end of a coaching session, the client will look for reinforcement by asking, “am I on the right track…thinking about my plan correctly?” And then some are more direct, “what advice would you give me?” As a coach, it’s important to remain in the coaching mindset. However, if I do switch to consultant mode, I try to let them know that I’m doing that, by using the phrase, “let me take off my coaching hat and put on my consulting hat.” That slows me down, it also lets them know I’m doing it too. Know the difference between coach and consult mode. (Note: even when people receive advice, they go ahead most times and do what they want or what they are comfortable with. So be wise and infrequent when giving advice.)

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365 Coaching Tips: 169th, 170th and 171st

June 18th Coaching Tip: Write.

For years, I wanted to write more. That was my goal, “write more.” Why am I writing more in 2025? Because I have a daily goal of sharing a coaching tip. It’s really that simple. Once I identified a realistic goal of writing a coaching tip daily, that helped me to truly launch my writing. My coaching tip today: write. Write every day, even if it’s like me, a simple paragraph or two.

June 19th Coaching Tip: Keep Writing.

It’s one thing to write for a few days, and in the past, I would take a break. The break could last for weeks or months or even years. What have I done differently this year to keep writing? I have a reminder on my iPhone calendar to write on my JenWilfong.com blog every single day. It’s working; I keep writing and it actually makes it easier now that it’s a daily part of my routine. Keep writing!

June 20th Coaching Tip: Become A Better Writer.

Now that I’m writing and sharing coaching tips daily, I’m aware of how others write even more than ever. I’ve been asking myself what I appreciate about their style, their grammar, their asks, their summaries, their simplicity, their ability to reach all the senses, etc. It’s helping me become a better writer as I read others’ writings. Write, keep writing, and become a better writer. As I am writing more frequently, it’s also helping me with the questions that I ask during my coaching sessions. I’m really focused on simplifying questions, utilizing words that are easily understood, and summarizing with the client as we wrap up the coaching session. Writing is helping me in my daily work responsibilities. Write.

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365 Coaching Tips: 166th, 167th and 168th

June 15th Coaching Tip: Rest Before Trips.

Knowing it was the Sunday before heading to New York City for three days of work, it was time to rest. And when I say rest, I mean resting in bed for most of the day, doing absolutely nothing. This will be my third trip to the City in 2025. When I’m visiting NYCity, rarely do I sleep well, I almost always eat too much of the incredible food, and I walk a lot of steps. Knowing all of my tendencies, it was time to rest before this trip. And as you travel for your work trips or your vacations across the globe, the first couple days can be quite taxing on the body, i.e. new bed, new time zone(s), new social interactions, delayed flights, different transportation modes, etc. Rest before trips.

June 16th Coaching Tip: Listen Intently.

I have the pleasure of coaching a large team who helps guide and care for a small number of very affluent, large clients. This team has crushed all of its YE2025 goals, and it’s only mid-June. So now what? Coast til yearend? Improve on something? Keep growing?

We had each team member share their answers to 1) what should we double down on and do even more in the second half of 2025, and 2) what must be fixed that no one is taking the time to fix. As I listened intently and paraphrased back what we were hearing, the individuals on the team around the team felt heard, uplifted, and ready to keep growing in the 2H2025. The leader agreed to spend one on one time with everyone to assess their personal and professional growth. If you want buy-in, “seek first to understand to be understood.” Listen Intently.

June 17th Coaching Tip: Celebrate With Others.

One guy with over 40 years is setting off to his retirement. Another gal in the crowd was celebrating 38 years of service. And I was sitting there with 13 years. We all celebrated these decades of experience that we’ve shared with our colleagues, clients, and the Company. The retiree shared words of wisdom, even using the short phrase of “be decent.” Not at performing but being decent to one another. Celebrate with others as they achieve milestones. It’s their moment to shine. CELEBRATE!

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365 Coaching Tips: 157th, 158th and 159th

June 6th Coaching Tip: Get Your Sleep.

Tomorrow is a big day. I’ve been training for months to hopefully compete and run faster than I did one year ago in my first ever Indiana Senior Games. This being my second time, I knew that I needed to eat properly, hydrate well, and get my sleep (over 7 hours). When I left my house for the 3-hour drive, I loaded up the cooler with “my food and my drinks” and checked in to the hotel around 6pm. And I was resting, in bed, by 8 pm, and woke up the next morning with exceptional sleep and resilience.

Prioritize your sleep for top performance. Lack of sleep can have many side effects, including reducing your life longevity. Get your sleep.

June 7th Coaching Tip: Compete With Yourself.

I challenged myself and competed against no one. That’s correct. No one.  BUT, I ran faster in the 100m, 200m and 400m than I did last year (June 2024) at the Indiana Senior Games. Sure, we had competition, but I had no one in my exact age bracket (60-64 years old) to compete against, so I just set out to beat myself. And that I did. I ran the 100m nearly two full seconds faster than my 2024 time, and I ran the 200m two seconds faster while running the 400m almost four seconds faster. So proud of myself for improving even though I’m a year older. It’s amazing what you can do, if you simply compete with yourself in a healthy manner.

June 8th Coaching Tip: Talk It Over.

Lots to do? Feeling a bit overwhelmed? Having a hard time prioritizing? Maybe your stuck? Talk it over with your partner or friend or spouse, and you may be surprised just how quickly a plan comes together. Why is that? Because most of us know exactly what we need to do and sometimes, we just need to say it out loud to someone we trust. Research indicates that when we write down priorities, and then share them with someone, we are much more likely to complete them. We feel this innate responsibility to honor the commit to thy self and your trusted person. In my situation recently, my partner had a lot going on, a lot. We were able to get my partner’s three key to do’s done in less than an afternoon. Although I wasn’t feeling the best (lil exhausted from the senior games), me simply allowing my partner to talk it over helped out bunches. Talk it over. 

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365 Coaching Tips: 151st, 152nd and 153rd

May 31st Coaching Tip: Introduce Yourself.

We joined our friends yesterday for dinner at a private club that they recently joined. As we were seated, I noticed that one of the restaurant greeters at the club had injured her right arm. After we were seated and ordered drinks and appetizers, I got up to go back and introduce myself to her. Why? Because I felt bad for her arm injury and wanted to learn more about her. She told me what happened and what are the next steps; she impressed me with her positive outlook and that she’s getting a pink cast for the summertime. We then discussed my 2007 injury when I broke both wrists on a fall; shared with her how important the three people were who cared for with expertise and empathy. We had much in common with our wrist/arm injuries. I’m so glad that I went to talk to here; I could have simply ignored her and walked on.

Then this morning on a short walk, I met a college guy that is staying in a condo for a couple month’s while he completes an internship. He was curious about the area, where to go to meet people, and real estate. He asked me what I did for work, and I told him alot, i.e. Caterpillar then to Merrill Lynch, and now investing in the market and real estateg. I’m so glad that I met Mo today; he’s from Toledo and this is his first time away from Toledo. We’ll keep an eye out for him now that we both introduced ourselves. Be intentional, kind and introduce yourself.

June 1st Coaching Tip: 529’s.

If you don’t understand 529’s, join the crowd. I’m NOT a financial advisor and I’m not giving you 529 advice nor investment advice. I am encouraging you to understand what a 529 is, how it might help someone with education costs, or how it might help someone in the future with their retirement. Get informed regarding what is available for people that are important to you. 529’s are worth understanding.

June 2nd Coaching Tip: Returning From Vacation.

On Sunday evening before I returned to work on Monday (after taking a week off), I quickly checked my work calendar and then also quickly checked my email inbox. This helped me get into the proper mindset to ease back in to work on Monday. Plus, in reviewing my emails, I could tell that one of the most important items that needed to be completed while I was out, welp, it didn’t get done. It sat idle for 4 workdays. Thank goodness I spotted this on Sunday evening, as it allowed me to prioritize this first thing Monday morning. I also blocked my calendar to take time to get caught up, connect with some colleagues, and remind/confirm others of upcoming appointments that are happening this and next week. How do you return from vacation? Do you have a process? My Sunday, intentional, quick check-in sure works for me.

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365 Coaching Tips: 142nd, 143rd & 144th

May 22nd Coaching Tip: Our High School Class.

Thanks to some of the gals from our 1982 high school graduating class, they have created a group for our class on Facebook. Not only do they keep us up to date on our classmates and their parents, but they also post positive and uplifting messages. Our class was special in high school from 1978 to 1982…and still is special. Even when we were teenagers, we bonded together. I don’t remember fighting; I remember support, fun times, community involvement, fellowship and Christian activities, high achievers, and academic as well as athletic accomplishments. If you are in touch with your high school classmates, good for you. Keep it rolling! If not, can YOU be the one that brings the classmates back together? Our high school class continues on our tradition of caring, now four to five decades later.

May 23rd Coaching Tip: Know Your Boss.

As an employee, it’s to your benefit to understand and know your boss. Of course, you’re already thinking that “no, it’s their responsibility to get to know me and get me!” For the relationship to work, it should actually work both ways. For example, my boss mentioned to me that she appreciates how I email her a summary of what’s going on prior to our monthly one-on-one. Now I do that summary email the day before we meet, so that she can has more time to read it before our one-on-one. Plus, she remembers it better, too. And during our one-on-one, since we both are more prepared and on the same page, it goes quicker, it gives me time to ask her what she needs me to do for her and the team. This two-way share is important to us both; we’re on the same page. Take time to get to know your boss and how they like to operate.

May 24th Coaching Tip: 112th Birthday Wishes.

Today would have been my grandmother’s 112th birthday. Although she passed in 2003, some 22 years ago, we had sweet memories of her today that my brothers and I shared with our mom. Our grandmother was a stunning gal, married a dapper guy from East Chicago Emerson and the Univ. of Michigan. She was a stay-at-home mother with two kids and also was a substitute teacher (she attended the Indiana Teachers College), got involved in local politics, the Red Cross, had some real estate holdings, and was widowed at 50 years old. She didn’t stop. She kept right on going and gave us three grandkids one on one time that we were reminiscing about today. It was sweet to share these memories with our own mother and to acknowledge her heavenly birthday.