Author: Jen Wilfong

Jen Wilfong Lake Worth Beach, FL Carmel, IN
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365 Coaching Tips: 187th, 188th and 189th

July 6th Coaching Tip: Weather Smart.

It was 5:47pm, still hot and steamy, so I decided to walk over to get an indoor workout in before heading out for a sunset cruise around 8:30pm. After my workout at 6:30pm, I walked out of the health club and noticed that the weather had changed dramatically. It stopped me, and I turned around and looked west and saw very dark clouds that were spooky looking. In one minute, I made the decision to cancel the sunset boat cruise. We called both of the couples who were going to drive about 1/2 hour to get to us. Sure enough, by 7:15pm the rain, thunder, and lightening started and it didn’t stop for three hours. Be smart. Be weather aware. Take precautions about where you are and where others are. I did NOT want our friends driving in bad weather; I wanted them to remain near or in their own homes, safe and sound. Be weather smart.

NOTE: I am deeply grieving today for the loss of now 81 people due to the flash flooding in the Texas Hill Country. Little girls and their camp counselors were swept away in a flood that raised 30 feet in less than an hour.

July 7th Coaching Tip: Stay Present.

In my last coaching session of the day, I was virtually meeting with a colleague in San Antonio, TX. Instead of jumping right in to “the work stuff”, something told me to slow down and ask the difficult question: “Mike, were you impacted by the flash floods in TX over the weekend?” Yes, he was. He shared with me that he had a friend’s daughter who had died (a camp counselor), a niece who was rescued and he shared what this lil 10-year-old girl witnessed as she was being rescued by a military helicopter. He shared which kids didn’t go to camp this past weekend but were planning to go in a few weeks. I asked a couple questions, so that I could pray for people by name. Mike admitted he was a mess, did not come on the virtual call at first and then later in our conversation he did turn on his video. He thanked me for staying present, asking how he was and grateful that I asked for their names to pray for them. It was the least I could do. Being and staying present is the best gift that one can give to someone else during times like these. Stay present. (Grateful for all those who responded to help with the recovery of this tragic disaster.)

Note: Since my line of coaching work has me coaching colleagues and leaders from all over the country and some from around the world, I make it a priority to be aware of what’s happening in their area and then slowing down to connect with them, instead of jumping right into the work.

July 8th Coaching Tip: Birthday Calls.

It was 8:45am E/7:45am C, and yes, it was time to call one of my gal pals and wish her a happy birthday today. We talked for about 10-15 minutes and are planning to have dinner together later in July. Make the call for birthdays; it’s so easy to just text or send a Facebook message. Phone calls matter today; they send a different vibe, much like a hand-written card or note. Although it takes a few more minutes, relationships matter so make those minutes count. Make birthday calls.

Note: I’m so thankful that my iPhone allows me to put in annual repeating reminders like key birthdays and anniversaries. When I looked at my schedule for today, there was Molly’s birthday at 7:00am. Use technology to intentionally help you stay connected with your favorite people. Friends are good for your overall wellness.

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365 Coaching Tips: 184th, 185th & 186th

July 3rd Coaching Tip: Be a Favorite Customer.

As our friends and family were prepping for the upcoming long July 4th weekend, we decided that we wanted some healthy Mediterranean food. I raised my hand to cater in some yummy gyro meat, salad, rice, hummus, sauces, and pita bread. At 3pm today, I called my favorite Med restaurant, verbally told them what I wanted, and they said, “we’ve already started your order; it’ll be ready in 15 minutes.” I got there in 22 minutes, walked in, the owner greeted me, I paid them, and he told all of his workers, “she is one of the best and favorite customers.” (He trusted me last August 2024 and catered my birthday party for over 100 people. Plus, we go there every couple weeks for carry out.) After I paid, he asked where I parked, then he and another employee carried out the trays of food, put them in my car, and smiled as they walked back into their restaurant. Be a favorite customer.

July 4th Coaching Tip: Laugh Alot With Friends.

Friends, fireworks, fun, freedom and family! It’s what July 4th is all about here in the USA. Today we celebrated my oldest brother’s (Brett) 64th birthday; we had nearly the entire family there, except for one niece and her man. Mom and her seven great grandkids were there, and all adults in between, to celebrate Brett at my other brother (Grant) and his wife’s lake home. It was the first time that the entire family got to hang out at this new “lake home” family destination.

Throughout the entire day, we also had friends at our lake condo, just a few miles away from my brother’s lake place. Our friends were enjoying the lake views, kayaking, swimming, eating, chatting it up, etc. Before the end of the evening and the fireworks, did we ever have some stories? We poured a beverage and walked up the stairs to our friends’ condo directly above us to watch the fireworks, as they were popping up from multiple locations. It was easy to watch and also spectacular. Then we sat on their back deck laughing our heads off until well after midnight. One of my friends named herself the “camp counselor” for the day; that will be her new nickname as we all head into our Golden Girls years together. Laugh a lot with your friends; we have been thru some stuff together these last couple years, and we know that we’re all in for a lot more challenges. Keep laughing with your friends to maintain your wellness.

July 5th Coaching Tip: Heavenly Sent.

The Punkin Vine Fair in Kentland, IN, is something that my family and I have been going to since the 1970’s. Today, I intentionally joined my mom at the Fair as we helped organize the fun during the 13 harness horse races; it’s our job to get the audience involved. We interview them and the Fair queen, we recognize the oldest and youngest fans, we allow everyone to put their name in a bucket each race to select the horse they think will win, and then we pick one winner, give out small gift bags and tickets to other Fair events.

To our surprise, the Fair Board agreed to have the second annual Lynn Wilfong Memorial Race. How exciting, because we were not expecting it. My brother (Brett) brought a horse to race, and by golly, it was in the LW Memorial Race. And what do you know, Brett’s horse was in second the entire race, then came roaring down the final stretch to win the race. It was a magical moment, my mom was shaking and my brother was smiling. We got the win, and we all realized that this day was heavenly sent. I’m so glad that I was there for this magical moment.

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365 Coaching Tips: 181st, 182nd and 183rd

June 30th Coaching Tip: Midyear 5R’s.

With it being June 30th, now’s the time to ask yourself and your team some questions. How much time did you take today or will you take (soon) to your reflect on your progress of what you wanted to accomplish in 2025? Who helped you accomplish key priorities? Who have you thanked? Who have you coached and further developed? What goals and priorities came up a bit short during these first six monthly of the year? And what might you continue to excel with during the 2H2025?

Now’s the time to review the first six months of the year by embracing five R words: Reflect. Recognize. Reward. Restart. Recommit.

July 1st Coaching Tip: Be Your Own Advocate.

As a 60-year-old with osteoporosis, I must advocate for myself. What does that mean? My primary care physician nor my endocrinologist did not call me to 1) schedule my annual blood test, 2) schedule an in-office appointment, and 3) schedule my annual infusion. I called them multiple times. My two previous annual injections were done in mid-May 2023 and June 21, 2024, so it’s time…right now. But first, the doc wants to see me and have my blood test results. And I want another bone density test, since it’s been three years (July 2022), to see if the two annual injections actually helped, stabilized or had no impact on my bone density. Advocate for yourself; if you don’t, who will be your wellness advocate? Have the courage to do it yourself.

July 2nd Coaching Tip: Stuff Happens. How do you respond?

How do you respond when “stuff” happens? Today, as I inspected the work on a project, I noticed three things: two were easy decisions, but the third could have been close to catastrophic. Calmly handling all three with good listening skills, I asked more questions to gain agreement on next steps. That allowed us to get all three situations taken care with no drama. The potentially catastrophic issue was actually done by a third party; I slept on it and then felt like they needed to know about it. Drafted an email and sent it to the third party. They responded professionally, didn’t “own it”, but they do now know that something happened. Bottom line, remember that stuff happens. How you respond is crucial; people may judge you during those moments and choose later to be a bit cautious with you. Respond calmly, get buy in, and have a plan.

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365 Coaching Tips: 178th, 179th and 180th

June 27th Coaching Tip: Keep At It.

Some days aren’t the best for energy. Today was one of those days for me. Some days I just have to tell myself to “pace myself, pace.” It’s like jogging or walking for exercise, you’re out there, at your pace. But you’re out there doing it, keeping at it. Even with work, sometimes if you let your colleagues know that you’re operating at a “6/10 or 5/10”, you will get some grace. And if you keep at it, your colleagues will appreciate your honesty, and most likely will say, “I got you.” Then when they are running a bit low on energy at a “5/10”, you will be more apt to help them out, too. The point is keep at it; don’t just stop.

June 28th Coaching Tip: It’s Fun Until It Isn’t.

My mom used this phrase today: It’s fun until it isn’t. I had never heard her say it before but it was so accurate for what was happening. My partner is realizing that utilizing her RV is quite a bit more work now that it used to be. As a kid, she loved trekking from TX to MI during the summer vacations. She has been utilizing her RV for trips and transporting dogs the last 5-10 years. I’m realizing that jogging is ok, up to 2-3 miles, and then I’m good.

Now, I have zero desire to run a half marathon, like I did when it was fun running half marathons regularly about 15 years ago. My partner will soon be selling her RV. Know your “no”; it’s ok to change. It’s ok to embrace Mom’s phrase: It’s Fun Until It Isn’t. You’re not giving up on your dream; you’ve already done it. Now might be the time for a new dream.

June 29th Coaching Tip: Change It Up.

Sometimes changing it up can really produce some better results. For example, I have a tendency to do the similar workout routines across a two week period. It’s my belief (and many health and wellness experts) that doing a variety of exercises can help reduce fatigue and potential injuries due to overworking an area. Today I jumped in the swimming pool and decided to tread water in the deep end for 10 minutes; my left ankle had just a hint of soreness, so my gut instinct was to change it up and exercise with a lower impact. I plan to swim more in the next few weeks to just give that ankle some recovery time, but keep my cardio workouts going. Don’t be afraid to change it up.

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365 Coaching Tips: 175th, 176th and 177th

June 24th Coaching Tip: Review Expenses Quarterly.

Take time quarterly or at least every six months to review all of your expenses. This one habit, done every 90 days, will help you manage your budget and may free up a bit of cash that was once unavailable. For example, I noticed that my ATT internet rate jumped from $50/mo to $70/mo. And another subscription jumped from $10 to $20/mo. As I investigated other options, I realized that I could get 3X’s faster internet service for $50/mo for up to three years AND it lowered my iPhone mobile bill by $10/mo, too. I made the switch over a couple months. Question is: was it worth it? Yes it was. $30/mo is saved over a three year period for my internet and iPhone, and the other subscription will save me $10mo/, which equals $1,440 over three years. Plus, I have much better and faster service.

If you found nearly $1,500 laying on the ground, I’m confident you would quickly grab it. It took a couple phone calls, approx. two hours of my time on these phone calls and then self-installing the new internet. Check those expenses quarterly to understand your budget. It’s like paying yourself.

June 25th Coaching Tip: Embrace Cancellations.

What the heck does embrace cancellations mean? When I have a coaching appointment that postpones or cancels, I embrace that opportunity of 30-60 minutes to get work done that had been getting pushed back. For example, I had a list of over 25 colleagues to reach out to who wanted coaching. Because I had a couple cancellations today, I was able to focus on those 25 people and reach out to them. The targeted effort worked, and many of the 25 responded quickly to set up time in July. Embrace cancellations; it can lead to other opportunities to help and coach others.

June 26th Coaching Tip: Coach or Consult.

There is a clear difference between coaching and consulting. Coaching is viewing your client/colleague as an equal partner, and with the right questions, truly believes that they do have the answers. These answers can many times be brought out of the client by the coach remaining present and curious, asking thoughtful questions. Consulting is listening and learning and then leaning in to giving advice and recommendations. Knowing the difference as a coach is important for me and my clients. Many times during the end of a coaching session, the client will look for reinforcement by asking, “am I on the right track…thinking about my plan correctly?” And then some are more direct, “what advice would you give me?” As a coach, it’s important to remain in the coaching mindset. However, if I do switch to consultant mode, I try to let them know that I’m doing that, by using the phrase, “let me take off my coaching hat and put on my consulting hat.” That slows me down, it also lets them know I’m doing it too. Know the difference between coach and consult mode. (Note: even when people receive advice, they go ahead most times and do what they want or what they are comfortable with. So be wise and infrequent when giving advice.)

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365 Coaching Tips: 169th, 170th and 171st

June 18th Coaching Tip: Write.

For years, I wanted to write more. That was my goal, “write more.” Why am I writing more in 2025? Because I have a daily goal of sharing a coaching tip. It’s really that simple. Once I identified a realistic goal of writing a coaching tip daily, that helped me to truly launch my writing. My coaching tip today: write. Write every day, even if it’s like me, a simple paragraph or two.

June 19th Coaching Tip: Keep Writing.

It’s one thing to write for a few days, and in the past, I would take a break. The break could last for weeks or months or even years. What have I done differently this year to keep writing? I have a reminder on my iPhone calendar to write on my JenWilfong.com blog every single day. It’s working; I keep writing and it actually makes it easier now that it’s a daily part of my routine. Keep writing!

June 20th Coaching Tip: Become A Better Writer.

Now that I’m writing and sharing coaching tips daily, I’m aware of how others write even more than ever. I’ve been asking myself what I appreciate about their style, their grammar, their asks, their summaries, their simplicity, their ability to reach all the senses, etc. It’s helping me become a better writer as I read others’ writings. Write, keep writing, and become a better writer. As I am writing more frequently, it’s also helping me with the questions that I ask during my coaching sessions. I’m really focused on simplifying questions, utilizing words that are easily understood, and summarizing with the client as we wrap up the coaching session. Writing is helping me in my daily work responsibilities. Write.

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365 Coaching Tips: 166th, 167th and 168th

June 15th Coaching Tip: Rest Before Trips.

Knowing it was the Sunday before heading to New York City for three days of work, it was time to rest. And when I say rest, I mean resting in bed for most of the day, doing absolutely nothing. This will be my third trip to the City in 2025. When I’m visiting NYCity, rarely do I sleep well, I almost always eat too much of the incredible food, and I walk a lot of steps. Knowing all of my tendencies, it was time to rest before this trip. And as you travel for your work trips or your vacations across the globe, the first couple days can be quite taxing on the body, i.e. new bed, new time zone(s), new social interactions, delayed flights, different transportation modes, etc. Rest before trips.

June 16th Coaching Tip: Listen Intently.

I have the pleasure of coaching a large team who helps guide and care for a small number of very affluent, large clients. This team has crushed all of its YE2025 goals, and it’s only mid-June. So now what? Coast til yearend? Improve on something? Keep growing?

We had each team member share their answers to 1) what should we double down on and do even more in the second half of 2025, and 2) what must be fixed that no one is taking the time to fix. As I listened intently and paraphrased back what we were hearing, the individuals on the team around the team felt heard, uplifted, and ready to keep growing in the 2H2025. The leader agreed to spend one on one time with everyone to assess their personal and professional growth. If you want buy-in, “seek first to understand to be understood.” Listen Intently.

June 17th Coaching Tip: Celebrate With Others.

One guy with over 40 years is setting off to his retirement. Another gal in the crowd was celebrating 38 years of service. And I was sitting there with 13 years. We all celebrated these decades of experience that we’ve shared with our colleagues, clients, and the Company. The retiree shared words of wisdom, even using the short phrase of “be decent.” Not at performing but being decent to one another. Celebrate with others as they achieve milestones. It’s their moment to shine. CELEBRATE!

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365 Coaching Tips: 160th, 161st and 162nd

June 9th Coaching Tip: Heads Up, Need Your Help.

Wasn’t feeling the best. Gave my colleagues a heads up. They stepped up. Don’t be afraid to wave the white flag every now and then.

June 10th Coaching Tip: Defuse. Pick Your Battles.

Wise elders like grandmothers and grandfathers might say to their family members, “pick your battles” or “don’t die on every hill” or “their problem isn’t your problem”. What does this mean actually? Recently, some of my colleagues were disturbed about the amount of untimely and unnecessary emails and requests. What’s the big deal, it’s just an email, right? Some of them were feeling untrusted and micromanaged, others simply ignored the emails, and then some just did the request and moved right on. Remember, it might just take less time than it would take to complain about something. Sometimes “running up the hill, even slowly” is better than “dying on the hill”. Pick your battles and help others defuse their anger.  

June 11th Coaching Tip: Just Get It Done.

Estimated federal taxes are due June 16th. It’s on my mind, so I just paid them. Who cares really if I paid them a couple days early. It’s now off of my mind; it’s done, and checking things off the list brings satisfaction and relief. Sometimes it is just best to just get it done. I don’t make it a habit of paying bills early, however I do make it a habit of paying them on-time or a day or two prior to help with my trustworthy reputation and also my credit score. With the busy-ness of the end of May and early June this year, I just decided to get those estimated taxes paid and be done with it.

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365 Coaching Tips: 163rd, 164th and 165th

June 12th Coaching Tip: Get Insurance Proof.

Ever hire a contractor and ask them, “can you please provide a copy of your valid insurance?” If you don’t, you should. Recently, we hired a contractor to remove some dead and splitting trees. Before he started, I requested a quote in writing and a copy of his insurance. Fast forward to the day that the contractor and his crew were working in the trees. And yes, you guessed it, the lead man was up in the tree when the other side of the tree started going down (these trees were splitting and the threat of them coming down unexpectedly is exactly why I was having them removed). The lead man was taken down as the entire tree came crashing down. Immediately, the entire job stopped; thankfully, the crew quickly called for an ambulance, the lead man was checked out at the hospital and released with nothing more than a scrape. Everyone was ok and for that we are all grateful. A couple days later, a copy of the valid insurance was emailed to me. Lesson learned: ask and receive insurance before contractors work on your job.

June 13th Coaching Tip: Go Til Then End.

It’s game four in the best of seven game series in the NBA Finals. The Indiana Pacers have a 2-1 lead in the series, they are playing at home in this 4th game, the crowd is roaring and the Pacers are winning by 5 points starting the final quarter. But something happened, and the Pacers lost their mojo. The OK City Thunder reached deep and tied the game with eight minutes remaining. Then Indiana made a run with three minutes left. But then the Pacers let the game slip away again in the last couple minutes and ended up losing by seven points. Think thru this: up four, lost by seven, which is an 11-point swing in a matter of minutes. Leaders, teams, people, kids, and everyone else: go til the end. It’s never over until it’s over. Be resilient and keep your dream of winning alive. Note: That loss led to OK City winning the next 3 of 4 games and helping them win the NBA championship.

June 14th Coaching Tip: Connect.

Mom and I made a plan of connecting and heading to my brother (Grant) and his wife’s home on the lake nearby. Three of his daughters and their men joined us for a yummy early Father’s Day afternoon dinner. Then Mom wanted to go see her horses race at Hoosier Park. Instead of just the two of going, I decided to reach out to friends and we had a total of nine of us at the track. Although the horses didn’t win, we had a full day of connection with family and friends who really matter. Was it on “Father’s Day”? Nope, it was the day before. But we made it work. On Father’s Day, we intentionally drove out to visit the cemetery where my father is buried. We connected with him, the good Lord, family and friends this weekend. Connect. Being isolated and reducing social connections can lead to dire situations; instead, intentionally connect, with purpose, and it may just bring you better health, resilience and wellness.

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365 Coaching Tips: 172nd, 173rd and 174th

June 21st Coaching Tip: Six Weeks of Practice.

Today I shot basketball for 30 minutes. Practicing my basket shooting will be a priority daily since it’s just six more weeks until the National Senior Games in Des Moines, Iowa. I’m registered to shoot in the free throw shooting contest (I will shoot 25 consecutive FT’s) and the 3-point shooting contest (I will shoot three shots from five locations at 19’9″ three-point line). The key here is consecutive. Although 25 and 15 consecutive shots doesn’t sound like a lot, I’m noticing that as I practice, these amounts can become fatiguing. My goal is to hit over 80% of my FT’s and 50% from 3-pt line at the competition. I’ve got some practicing to do, but I’m committed to do it for six more weeks.

June 22nd Coaching Tip: Stay Cool, Heat Kills.

Yesterday and today were dangerously hot in the Midwest and it’s expected to continue until June 26th. We are avid watchers of The Weather Channel and learn so much. We learned this weekend that more people die annually due to excessively high temperatures than tornadoes, hurricanes, and water/flooding. We stayed in throughout the day or in the shade; we said no to friends who wanted to go out on the lake during middle of the afternoon. We drank alot (water, tea, vitamin water, etc.) and did activities in the early evening, before the sunset. Stay cool, stay hydrated, stay charged up (your cell phone or device), and stay in touch. Excessively hot temperatures are nothing to mess around with: heat kills. Be intentional about staying cool when it’s dangerously hot; it’s not worth the risk.

June 23rd Coaching Tip: Plan The Midyear Review.

Today a coaching discussion revolved around a team that is looking to develop a new career path for one of their colleagues. This teammate doesn’t know it’s about to happen, nor does the office leadership team. The team’s leaders were leveraging me and our confidential prep conversation to start figuring out how they were going to message this to their colleague and their office leadership team. Immediately in to our conversation, I could tell that they were not thinking through this “exception” as an exception. For example, when you are asking for an exception, you had better have put together a rock solid, exceptional business case justification. They had not done that at all. They were assuming a lot and being secretive.

We worked together on this situation with focused purpose for approximately 45 minutes; we agreed for them to work on it some more and then come up with a timeline on when they would present it and to whom. More to come, but it’s midyear. Don’t be surprised; be ready and prepped for those midyear reviews.