Category: Change

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365 Coaching Tips: 82nd, 83rd and 84th

March 23rd Coaching Tip: Friends First.

As I watched my IU Hoosier women’s basketball team wrap up their loss to South Carolina, I noticed that one of our IU players stopped and truly hugged one of the SC players. And then, after all the players shook hands, the SC player came back thru the line and hugged, then quickly gave a sweet cheek-kiss to the IU player. Why would they do that, aren’t they competitors? Yes, of course they are competitors. But they are friends first and have been friends for years. It was a pleasant site to witness, and the TV cameras even showed the parents of both of these players hugging each other. As you compete, remember to remain friends with those who really are friends. I’ve learned that I now have friends that I competed against or with daily in practice, and I’m so glad that many are still my friends. Friends first!

March 24th Coaching Tip: Evolve.

My word for the year is Reduce. One of my colleague’s word is Evolve. I like it, because she is our senior coach, with incredible experience, and more senior than me and our manager. She wants to continue to evolve by embracing new ways of doing business, learning from others, and working a bit differently. If you were in the last few years or months of your career, how willing would you be willing to evolve?

Many of my elders have shared with me that when you stop learning and growing, you start slipping and dying. Now that I have more grey hairs, I truly support this thinking. Tonight, we watched “The Americas” series on Peacock, narrated by Tom Hanks. We kept watching episode after episode, consuming all of the incredible cinematography as well as the education on all of these animals, insects, and species. Keep evolving.

March 25th Coaching Tip: No 2am Texts.

My mother and I talk and text every single day. We share a lot and are very close. Over the last month, she has shared with me that someone in our family has texted her at 2am on a couple occasions and has also sent an additional 8-10 texts since March 19.

This is a coaching lesson in emotional intelligence: 1) when you want a senior/elderly/84 year old woman to help you, don’t text them at 2am. 2) when you want help, maybe call them and ask how THEY are doing and really care about what is shared. 3) if you are sending an additional 8-10 texts, look in the mirror, and ask yourself, “why aren’t I getting any response?” (from the 84 year old woman). 4) and don’t deny it when you are called out for doing it.

I have texted my family member twice now, and let them know that my mom is busy thru tax time (April 15) and managing over 10 farms. I also requested that the 2am texts stop. Due to al ack of emotional intelligence, the family member (of course) indicated that they don’t text much, didn’t do the 2am texts, wasn’t adding any stress to the situation, and indicated this was like high school drama. Bottom line: wake up, look in the mirror, own your errors, be more in tune with elderly people, and for goodness sakes, don’t be rude to them when you need a favor. Seniors (like my mother) have who multiple stents in their hearts and have had two hip surgeries in the last 2+ years, lost their husband of 63 years, keep their phone “on”, charged up, and nearby. and their Apple watch on their wrist. Just stop and think, no 2am texts.

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365 Coaching Tips: 64, 65 & 66

March 5th Coaching Tip: Step Up.

In a couple of my coaching conversations today, the advisors that were leading their teams were frustrated with the lack of consistent high-level execution by their teammates. As I listened to them, it was clear to me that it was time to have the discussion, “step up or step out” with these underperforming teammates. However, as I drove home, it got me thinking, “what has the leader done to help them execute better? how are he/she coaching and developing them? what would the teammate say about the leaders and their instructions to complete tasks?” Both the leader and the teammates need to step up. If after all coaching and developing has been done, then it may be time for the teammate to “step out” and find a better role or fit elsewhere.

March 6th Coaching Tip: Remain Curious.

As we were driving to the airport this evening, we looked out the window to the south and there was something we had never seen before. It looked like a drone with lights was falling and spinning a bit out of control. We just couldn’t figure it out. Once I got to the airport, I started reading online to seeing anyone else noticed it or even recorded it. Sure enough, with a few minutes, figured it out: the SpaceX Starship had a fiery breakup, after departing from TX. This is the second explosion in the last two launches. Thank goodness there were no humans on board. For all of us, remain curious if you see something different or out of the ordinary. This applies to darn near everything in your life…including the engineers at SpaceX. I’m sure they are now very curious about why their efforts failed two times in a row. And it applies to your life, your personal safety, your kids, your home. Remain curious.

March 7th Coaching Tip: Keep it close.

You can’t win everything and always be atop the leaderboard on everything. With life comes losses. With life comes challenges. With life comes new or younger talent. If you can’t win, keep it close. My beloved Indiana University women’s basketball team really gave an outstanding team effort against the team from Univ of Southern California in the second round game of the Big Ten tournament. USC had much more talent than IU, but the IU women never ever gave up, kept up their intensity high until the end, and only lost by five points.

With basketball or business, it’s challenging. Be ready, as someone or some other company or team is always after you/your business. It might be developing a better product, at a lower price. It maybe a new, younger and quicker talent on the court; or more mature players who can execute under pressure. Bottom line, it’s hard to win at everything, all the time. If you do lose, do it with class: learn from it, evaluate your next steps, and keep it close. Always.

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365 Coaching Tips: 61, 62 and 63

March 2nd Coaching Tip: REST.

REST. I learned that acronym from a four-star general who spoke to leaders at Caterpillar over 15 years ago. And here we are 15 years later, and I can easily recall the essence of his message: take time to Read relevant and timely information, ensure you get your Exercise (150 minutes/week), get enough Sleep (7-8 hours), and Take Time To Think.

This general reinforced that the easy decisions are already made at an individual level or a lower level. The decisions that get to you as a high level leader or business owner are more difficult, and it’s imperative that you have time to think clearly about important decisions and all the potential and unintended consequences. REST, because it matters to your results, personally and professionally.

March 3rd Coaching Tip: Draft.

Today was my third coaching conversation with a future leader, and he has big plans for the current team, the current leader’s succession plan, and the growth that makes him giddy with excitement. He had been talking alot about it, quickly, and excitedly, but he wasn’t clearly articulating it. In our 2nd conversation, his homework was to draft/sketch what was in his head and put it on “paper”.

I was so proud of him today; prior to our meeting time, he emailed me his draft plan, and it was simple with just 4 pages. He had already used it the draft with the local management team, he has talked to his current leader, and now ready to share the draft with him/current leader. As we both spent 70 minutes really digging in to it today, we further improved it, added a few more details. He also agreed to keep it as an updated version with a date, so that he can keep track of the progress, plans, and be able to share the history with anyone who may join the team. Draft it up, it will help bring clarity to you … and others.

March 4th Coaching Tip: Time is Money.

Got up early today, drove to Coral Gables, FL to meet a colleague so that we could coach a number of leaders and advisors. We were there, on time, and ready to roll. The support women had sent out the emails and reminders, and ordered a lovely lunch. However, the office manager/leaders had NOT done the appropriate prep, didn’t have enough appointments set up for us, thus, it was an average day of efficiency. Actually, it was below average. For an upcoming two-day trip to New York City with this same group, you bet that I will be ensuring the schedule BEFORE we leave, so that others understand how valuable my time is. My schedule should be filled with high priority clients who want coaching and improvement.

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365 Coaching Tips: 55, 56 and 57

February 24th Coaching Tip: Talent Everywhere.

Tonight, I had the difficult challenge of selecting four deserving winners of four scholarships from over 94 applicants. Why so difficult? Because the talent on these scholarship submissions was beyond impressive. There’s talent everywhere, all around us. These were written by the high school seniors, and a recommendation letter was also included from their high school administrators. These kids were 100% student athletes, and shared numerous examples and stories of how they are learning how to be disciplined, a good teammate, serve others in the community, keep their grades in good check, win and lose, deal with injuries, deal with coaching changes, and on and on.

On a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the highest score, I mostly awarded the applicants with 7, 8, and 9’s. It was difficult to select the 10’s for the four scholarships, but I did it. The lesson that I learned here is that our kids today are juggling a lot and delivering in a very social world. There’s talent everywhere. Question: are you taking the time to witness them in action, mentor them, and help them become the adults that they want to become? They are ready!

February 25th Coaching Tip: Hold Yourself Accountable.

During three of my coaching calls today, it was all about helping the leader figure out what he/she could do to hold himself accountable to important goals. After listening and asking some clarifying questions on their priorities, one indicated $1m by the next time we talk. And before the end of the day wrapped up, he sent me an email indicating he had already done over $150k of that $1m goal. Another picked up on the number three. He needs to develop himself as a better leader, while coaching his two new associates. All three need to develop; he agreed to spend 3-5 minutes/day with them both, and also embraced the ‘rule of 3’ to help them develop. The rule of 3 encourages new colleagues to try to figure out the answer by digging in and being resourceful in 3 different manners, BEFORE asking the boss for help. It teaches them to “fish”, instead of interrupting someone else and getting the answer. The third leader that I coached had made great progress since July 2024, and yet he didn’t feel that good about it. We summarized all that he has accomplished, and then he pivoted and was ready to continue to be held accountable through yearend 2025. Hold yourself accountable, whether you have a coach or not. Accountability works.

February 26th Coaching Tip: Leverage Partners.

Today I had to coach myself. With three projects coming up in the next 90 days, I had to take some time to figure out WHO can help me, identify WHAT can they help me with, and WHEN do I need their assistance. We had an effective conference call at 9am, and by 10:15am, we had the plan regarding who’s going to do what by when. I was relieved to have these talented partners to work with.

I’m also remodeling a 95-year-old farmhouse, and boy, am I ever leveraging partners and specialists. At the end of nearly every day, my contractor will either text me with an update, send photos that are self-explanatory, or we facetime. He also does a great job of introducing me to all of his sub-contractors (partners), and my whole goal is to get to know them a bit, create a bond, and get a smile on their face. These men are helping me with electric, plumbing, demolition, roofing, siding, drawings, framing, drywall, leveling floors and walls, etc. You get my point; they are doing it all. I haven’t lifted a hammer yet and am 1,000 miles away. Leverage your partners and figure out how to get more done by leverage their expertise.

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365 Coaching Tips: here’s to 52, 53 and 54

February 21st Coaching Tip: Recovery.

Some days, one needs recovery. After having two consecutive nights of less sleep than what I like to get, I decided to “recover” today. My exercise today included just a one-mile of fast walking; then I took a nap in the late afternoon by the pool and finished the evening with three short strolls before laying it down early. Even with my work today, I took a few less coaching calls, and I didn’t jam in things today due to my focus on my priority: recovery. I was still productive and ate balanced, just made the decision to turn down the dial a bit and recover. Prioritize yourself: you are your most valuable asset. Allow recovery.

February 22nd Coaching Tip: Text Real Quick.

If you’re trying to get ahold of someone, give them a quick text and simply ask, “are you free for 10 minutes?” or “is this a good time?” or “when do you have a solid 20-30 minutes? Need to run something by you.” Research indicates that a high percentage of our texts get answered in seven minutes or less. Seven minutes. If you want to connect with someone, give them a text, arrange a time, and then be ready to share your idea/question when you do get that time scheduled. It doesn’t work for everything or everyone, but for many, simply text real quick.

February 23rd Coaching Tip: Sunday Funday.

Sometimes, one just needs a beach chair and a sunset. And that’s exactly what we did today. We took it easy, enjoyed some “church time” at home, watched and listened to some relaxing geography and animal shows, did our workouts, ate well and prepped some meals for the week. But the quiet time and the beauty of southwest coast of FL was calling our names. We threw a couple beach chairs in the car, grabbed a couple sweatshirts and some water, then drove to the beach. Heck, we even squeezed our convertible into a partial parking spot, and it worked. We just sat there for an hour and simply enjoyed all that the good Lord created. It was a wonderful way to end our Sunday Funday.

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365 Coaching Tips: 40, 41 and 42

February 9th Coaching Tip: Set High Standards.

Yesterday, I witnessed an uncomfortable moment. During a college softball game, the batter laid down a bunt, and then slowly ran towards first base, almost turned out of the baseline. It appeared to everyone at the game that the batter had already told herself that she would be thrown out and had convinced herself not to run fast to first base. Meanwhile, the defense/3rd baseman mishandled the bunt and had an errant throw to first base. Frustration sat in quickly by the batter’s teammates, as they screamed at her for not running hard to first base. And then the uncomfortable moment really happened: the head coach, standing in the 3rd base coaching box, shouted across the field to her team’s dugout, and said, “Stop…stop screaming at her (the batter). Seniors, you set the culture, step up and don’t allow this lazy culture to sneak in.” The entire crowd was in a bit of shock.

However, it worked. The next inning, these same gals went out and got hits, loaded the bases, and then a senior hit a triple that knocked in 2 more runs. That’s responding to an uncomfortable moment, by the seniors. The seniors did know the standards and responded to the accountability that the coach called out. What makes this special is that there was a high standard that was set, and the seniors quickly realized that they were the problem, and they fixed it immediately. Set high standards.

February 10th Coaching Tip: Clarify Goals.

As we are now in the 10th day of the 2nd month of the new year, recommend that it’s a great time to ask your colleagues and teammates IF they have 100% clarity on the goals. If they do have clarity, have them state what are the goals and their roles in making those goals happen. If they do NOT have clarity, then help them gain clarity. For example, ask what else do they need to understand, repeat what the goals were, ask them to rephrase how those goals impact them in their role, etc.

To help improve employee engagement, clarify goals and roles. Today, I realized that I don’t have to do three things that I did in 2024. This give me more time and mindspace to work on coaching and speaking. I’m thrilled, as I was not aware of these changes…because they had not been communicated until today. Now I can truly focus my time on these new, fewer high priority goals, Clarify goals.

February 11th Coaching Tip: Say What?

Every now and then, we hear things and roll it around in our head for a few, and then say, “Say What?” It happened to me today. Overnight, I had received a couple emails about an important and urgent situation that just didn’t make complete sense. Then we found out more info, and yet more info. Recommend that if you are saying to yourself, “say what?”, dig in, find out more info, set up some quick meetings/conference calls with people who are aware of the situation to gain their insights, all in an effort to understand. This deliberate action of learning more will help you move on from “say what?” to “ok, now I understand.” In my coaching work, sometimes we see teammates become overwhelmed or frozen, and then they don’t do anything. Seek to understand when others are looking at you awkwardly, stunned with silence, or have no input. Help them move on from, “say what?”

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365 Coaching Tips: Here’s to 25, 26 and 27

January 25th Coaching Tip: Leadership Matters.

In many of my coaching sessions lately, leaders are frustrated with employees and teammates who leave their teams, and some of these leaders also claim that there’s no talent out there to replace them. As we dig into what happened and what drove the teammate to depart the team, rarely does the leader indicate that it was him/her. It’s usually something like the teammate left for more money, they had a baby, they are relocating, they, they, they. It’s my responsibility, as a coach, to ask compelling questions. For example, “what did you learn from this? what do you own in this? how were you developing this teammate? how are you attracting talent to be ready for teammate exits? ”

Leadership is hard, Leadership really matters to those who follow you. I’d encourage you to ask the questions: How are you investing in yourself, especially if you lead others? What are you reading, and then implementing? Who is a leader that is mentoring you or could mentor you? Are you a good boss, and how do you know that you’re a good boss? Are you easy to follow? Do you truly connect with your teammates? Do you micromanage or coach, develop and empower?” Leadership matters, and if you master it, teammates will stay and be loyal.

January 26th Coaching Tip: Fundamentals Matter.

Today I watched a college basketball team come back, score 5 points in the last 23 seconds, and win a game on the road in a loud environment. I also watched a team lose the game, who gave up 5 points in the last 23 seconds. This losing team had a lack of clarity on clock management, who should be fouled and when, who should not be left open, who to throw the ball to, how to score with less than 5 seconds in the game and down by 1 point. Whether it is basketball or going to a networking event or driving a car, execute on fundamentals. Networking event: set a goal of meeting new people, ask questions and truly listen, then remember it is not about how much food you can eat. Driving a car: drive defensively, stay to the right if you’re going slower, look left then right and then left again before proceeding thru a stop sign or green light. Fundamentals matter. By not looking left to see oncoming traffic before proceeding into an intersection can potentially kill you. Contrast that with taking 1-2 seconds and clearly knowing that no one is coming at you.

January 27th Coaching Tip: Stay Sharp.

Today, the stock market was impacted by one announcement in the artificial intelligence (AI) space. According to news reports, one company lost over $600 billion in value in one day. By the next day, $200 billion had already been reinvested back into this company. With these type of swings, some may say to just ignore it, keep your head in the sand, etc. However, recommend that you stay somewhat aware, stay sharp on what’s happening around you and what’s impacting the business world. Why? As we age, it’s common for me to hear our seniors say, “I’m a dinosaur. I’m not very techy.” Dinosaurs died and are gone. Tech is here and not going away. Stay relevant, embrace what is happening in the world around you. That doesn’t mean you have to agree with everything, but be aware and stay sharp. In your kitchen, dull knives need sharpened from time to time…or they just stay dull and go unused. Keep ’em sharp!

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365 Coaching Tips: here’s 16, 17 & 18

January 16 Coaching Tip: Clear Goals. In coaching a few teams in the last couple days, it was very evident to me that the team nor its leaders had any clear goals. In asking questions like, “what are you most pleased with from your work in 2024? where are you headed in 2025? And what will you do the same and also different in 2025?”, it really helped the teams figure out their goals. It also helped that we had plenty of time and were not rushed, so that we could really discuss and prioritize the goals. Truly asking questions, listening to their responses, giving time for all to speak, allowed for well understood goals that were much more cohesive and focused than the beginning of the coaching sessions. As we wrapped up, their three main goals started with the number eight: 80%, $800,000, and $80mil. I was so delighted that they were ready to meet again and continuously throughout 2025 to share their progress on their results. We went from having no goals to identifying well understood goals, and sensed a strong commitment to achieve them; this made me smile. Get clarity on your goals, whether personally or professionally.

January 17 Coaching Tip: Set Expectations. Since November, I’ve been working with new contractors to help me with a significant farmhouse remodel. New general and sub contractors, new interior designer, and a new architect are all helping me do this, as I’m in Florida working. In meeting with all of them, I’m clearly letting them know my expectations of what I want and need from them, as we remodel a nearly 100 year old home. For example, this home is old, and I want to honor it’s 1930’s farmhouse legacy with some new yet timeless touches. I also want 1930’s crooked floors and ceilings to be straight and level, for fashion, functionality and also safety. I want it to be clean, safe, and dry, and get the water draining away from the home. I want it to be thoughtful and functional, with what we defined as A- workmanship. It does not have to be perfect A+ work, but it must be better than B or B+ work. This clarity has really helped my new colleagues/contractors as we all make decisions together. If others around you don’t understand what you need or are expecting, it might be wise to look in the mirror. Set expectations and reinforce them regularly. And reward/recognize when those around you when they absolutely nail them!

January 18th Coaching Tip: Embrace Tools. Over the last couple years, many of my coaching sessions have been about capacity. For example, I very frequently hear comments like, “we are overwhelmed, we are busy, we need more people, we don’t have time, etc.” As I ask more questions about capacity, many times I have found that tools are not being utilized enough, even though some tools/IT/processes/support have already been paid for. I use this example regularly: “who still calls the taxicab service, reserves a car, hopes that the taxi comes on time to the proper address, the driver is pleasant, the car is clean and safe, and you arrive at your destination on time?” Few still do this, very few. Most are utilizing their cell phone to arrange a ride (with Lyft or Uber), and it can be done within seconds, with complete transparency, and the payment is automated and more secure. When I use this example, all of the sudden, the brains in the room start cranking…”what can we use to improve our capacity? what should we stop doing? what must we continue? what do we need to learn and be trained on to implement quickly?” Within 5-10 minutes, we can quickly identify a number of tools or processes that should be implemented immediately to gain capacity. That metaphor of, “I’m busy sawing, don’t have time to sharpen my saw…” is at play in numerous coaching sessions. Take some time and figure out how to embrace new tools, and utilize the ones that are and have been available.

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365 Coaching Tips: Now on day 7, 8 & 9

It takes commitment and consistent execution to implement a new habit, and I’m really liking this new habit of identifying a coaching tip (or trend) daily. We have made the first hurdle of a new habit, and that’s doing it intentionally for at least one week.

January 7 Coaching Tip: Be Specific. With the new year beginning and my coaching work is now ramping up, a number of my coaching sessions have been focused on “I want to grow my business.” I simply ask, “can you be more specific?” That’s when it can get quiet. The silence spurs more questions. Ultimately, these type of questions get asked: “how will you grow”, “how will you spend your time differently”, “who are you targeting”, “what should you not do this year”, “which type of clients do you want to replicate”. The more specific that you can be about what YOU want to accomplish, I find it’s more likely that you will be successful. And further research indicates that if you write the goal/specifics, you are much more likely to succeed. For example, I have post-it notes on my mirrors and desks that remind me of my quarterly goals. Everyday, I am looking at those specific goals.

January 8 Coaching Tip: Backup Plans. We don’t want to think about backup plans, but when we have them, we sure are happy when we can quickly and somewhat effortlessly put them in motion. Today, on two different occasions, I was working with coaching situations where there was no backup planning by the coachee; they had one plan and just assumed it would go the planned way. As I asked a few questions, I could quickly tell that they needed to think more broadly and thoughtfully, regarding a backup/2nd or even a 3rd scenario. One situation was already in turmoil and they were in triage mode, losing sleep, begging for assistance, etc. We quickly put together a plan for a 2nd and 3rd option in both cases. Backup plans are necessary for many stages in our life journey; don’t be surprised when things re-route you. Have a plan and be ready, or at least somewhat ready.

January 9 Coaching Tip: Measure Frequently. If any of my coachees want to execute on a new goal, I ask them, “what are you measuring, and how frequently are you measuring it?” For example, one of my coachees wants to grow their business by 15% in 2025. We talked about reviewing the results monthly, measuring progress weekly, and assessing and tracking daily activity that contributes to growth. For me, I have some goals this summer to be able to run faster. Therefore, I’m tracking three things daily: my VO2MAX level on my Apple watch, my weight every morning, and my times when I run sprints weekly. If my VO2MAX increases, and I weigh a bit less all while continuing to run my sprints, I should be running faster this summer that I ran in June 2024. Guess what, 9 days into the new year, and my VO2MAX has increased and I’ve dropped a pound or two. Progress, bit by bit.

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Repurposing My Time

Since December 19th (2024), I’ve taken a number of consecutive days off, and won’t return to full duty work until January 6th (2025). Already liking how it feels, i.e. days off with no vacation planned. Let me explain what I’m thinking.

Whether I retire from my corporate run at two Fortune 100 companies in 15, 10, 5 years, or even in 1 year, my intention is to repurpose how I utilize my time. We all have 24 hours in a day, and I don’t intend on “retiring”. There’s too much to do still in my life. In fact, truly believe that my most impactful work in helping others is coming next. As they say, “The best is yet to come!”

Recently, I repurposed my time (from working 8 hours/day) to this:

Wake up, take more time to enjoy my coffee and read my devotionals, journal my wellness goals and activity, get my exercise done, contact key people in my life, plan healthy meals and then prep those healthier meals (than in the past), drive to meet contractors to check on my next real estate project, read the newspapers/magazines/books that have piled up, organize some stacks that needed attention for quite a while, and figure out ways to help others by understanding the most important needs of the community.

Bottom line, I like how these last few days have felt. Remember, no vacation planned. Just me being at home. It actually felt healthier than trying to squeeze all of these items in, while making work the “priority” from 7am (getting all ready, driving to work, or going upstairs for remote work) until 5pm-ish.

Yes, I’m grateful for the work that I’ve been doing since 1986 in the corporate world; it’s all provided me with a wonderful lifestyle and with ample healthcare and travel opportunities. However, I’m ready to utilize my God-given skills to help others, to help them become better citizens of the world, via business, real estate, non-profits. I even think there’s room for the world to learn how to be a better daughter (since I have the most amazing mother), sister, aunt, friend, neighbor, god-mom, etc.

How will you repurpose your time, when you make the decision to retire? Whenever I chose to make this move, I’m going to be ready. Why? In my coaching work, I’ve seen countless people who have “retired” and have not spent enough time figuring out what they are moving to, how will they spend their time, identify what do they deeply care about, etc.

Coach Jen tip: Don’t wait, think ahead, plan and prep on how you will repurpose your time, before you retire. If you need a coach to help you with repurposing of your time, get one.