Tag: Courage

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Dad’s Wisdom, Use Your Vacation in 2013 (424 million days of paid vacation went un-used in USA)

In 2010, my father shared some wisdom at his and my mother’s 50th anniversary party: “Have someone to love, love what you do, and have something to look forward to.” Isn’t it best to embrace what your father says, right? Why? Because 424 million paid vacation days went un-used in America in 2012 (source: WSJ, 12/2012). In our house, we have a fun discussion at the beginning of every year to openly share our annual goals, complete with some yummy Reuben sandwiches. We find that this tradition really matters, including every single ingredient, all the way down to the type of mustard on the Reuben. To help ensure accountability, balance, and adjustments that might be necessary throughout the year, we have quick planning discussions every weekend that help us plan our meals, time for exercise, commitments to others (family, friends, and work), and future trips and vacations.  Thanks to my Dad’s advice of “have something to look forward to”, we created some very special moments in 2012, centered on sports.  Here’s just a few of them:

Super Bowl. One of our bucket list items was accomplished.  Living in Indianapolis, why not go see one of your favorite teams play in Super Bowl XLVI? Plus, our dear friends, my parents, nieces and nephew, brother and sis-in-law came in to town to enjoy the festivities.  Priceless memories made, even though our team lost.

Tennis. We are huge tennis fans and had not been to the US Open in New York City since the early 1990’s. When do you get the chance to see Roger Federer, Novak Djokovic and Venus Williams in the same day? Without any tickets, we jumped in the car and drove a couple hours to Cincinnati and saw them play. So worth it!

Indy 500. My family loves this Hoosier tradition; we have been to the Indy 500 for many years.  But this year, I was given the opportunity to go around the Speedway track at a very fast speed.  Why not, right? Wow, those were an few exhilarating minutes. Took me an hour to settle in, but I called my dad to tell him what I did; he was thrilled I got that opportunity.  And, I got to meet and visit with Mario Andretti.

Golf. The PGA returned to The Crooked Stick Golf Club in Carmel, IN.  Located just minutes from our place, I walked the course and watched former #1 Tiger Woods and current #1 Rory McIlroy play together.  What a treat to see this, because the PGA announced that it also was the tournament of the year.

Boston in Philadelphia. We headed to Lehigh, PA for my cousin’s college graduation ceremony.  Not only did we embrace the trip, we also went to see the Phillies vs. Red Sox and the 76ers vs. Celtics, and reconnected with a couple of friends.  This renewed relationship is now beyond strong; we’ve already  vacationed together and are planning another trip in 2013. My cousin was thankful beyond words, because we were there to see her graduate, through an outdoor ceremony in an absolute rain shower.

Half Marathon. Two of our best girl friends had never been up for running, but run we did.  The six of us gals trained for this event (held here in Carmel) and we all finished.  We proved we all could do it; the connection and strength gained by completing a difficult task further cemented our relationships. Oh, and then we ate and celebrated the rest of the weekend!

Foul Balls. As Red Sox fans, if they play at Wrigley, isn’t that a must do event? Well of course it is, and bring along your best friends (and their kids who have never been to Wrigley). And during the 5th inning, a foul ball heads our way, and yes, we grab it.  What a memory that all of us will never forget, especially as we were telling stories around midnight at the IHOP by Wrigley Field.

Like most of us, we do a great job of planning our to-do lists and daily schedule for the kids’ activities and our work.  Try a little self-assessment by asking these few questions: How well are you planning your life? What type of moments are you creating that will impact you and your family forever? What do you want your legacy to be? How will you implement accountability to plan your personal life as diligently as you do the rest of your life? Happy 2013!

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The Three Most Important Questions of Your Life

Have you ever had that moment in a conversation when someone asked you a few questions, and your answers were a bit unsettling? From 2007-2010, I realized it was going to take some work to be able to answer the three most important questions in my life. So in January 2010, I signed up for a program called “Life Launch,” which helped me to articulate further my answers to these three questions.

1. Are you living where you want to live? My Answer: No.

Realizing that we wanted to be closer to family, live in a larger city, with easy access to a great airport, arts, sports and culture, achieve moderate cost of living with world class health care, we identified five cities that would meet these deep needs.  In November of 2011, we relocated to Carmel, IN, and months later, it was named by Money as the #1 place to live in America for small cities. Call that lucky, for sure.

Young adults today have this question figured out. Unlike the Baby Boomer generation who relocated multiple times and lived in the suburbs with long commutes, the trend is that this new generation is courageously moving to where they want to live first, and then finding meaningful work with a limited commute.

2. Are you doing what you want to do? My Answer(s): Yes & No

Marketing had been my life for 20+ years, but I found that I truly enjoyed coaching others and watching them develop. From 2006-2011, I connected with three amazing executive coaches and admired the work they did and how they did it. I soon realized a future role for me was to become a coach. After attending “Life Launch” in early 2010, I completed a year-long coaching certification program that year.  It was training that I needed; it helped me become a certified coach, but also a better person, listener, partner, and friend.

We ask people in casual conversations that infamous question, “what do you do?” How incredible could the conversation potentially be if someone asked, “what do you want to become?” or “are you doing what you really want to do?”

Every day, I encourage colleagues and friends to embrace their strengths, because the return on improving your strengths and deploying them is an 8-10X return (StrengthsFinder 34, Rath & Conchie). If you don’t like your job or role and know you that you have strengths being under-utilized, then put your plan in place to soon be doing what you are good at because the return will be much greater.

3. Are you with who you want to be with? My Answer: Yes

In 2007, I broke both wrists in a bad fall.  I realized quickly who were the most reliable people in my life. When you can’t feed, wipe, or wash yourself, you truly realize who are your friends and family.  That fall helped me realize that I did have the right person in my life, to be my partner.  We also realized that our friends were truly incredible; a couple of our friends went to the wayside, but the bulk of our real friends were amazingly there. We also realized that as we age, we wanted to be closer to family so that we could be there for them, if and when needed.

In interviewing the elderly in The Blue Zones, Dan Buettner quickly realized that centenarians have strong social connection locally and regularly.  If you aren’t with who you want to be with, his long-living research would hint to resolve that and be with who you want to be with.

As you progress through life, how can you ask yourself these three important questions? How can you ensure that you are living your life, completely on purpose? How can you utilize these questions with loved ones, and give them the gift of listening to their answers? We all can be distracted at times during our lives or even take detours, but these three questions might just help you get back on your purposeful highway of life. Recommend finding a memorable time to annually ask yourself these questions, self assess, and make appropriate adjustments wisely.

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Transform Results? The Courage to Change

The only way we really learn how to swim is by jumping in (the swimming pool or off the dock into the lake). The fear we overcome quickly is turned in to courage. This courage quickly translates into new skills and talents. Let’s take a couple recent examples in the sports world that have transformed careers.

Cool hand Luke. As an average George Mason basketball player, Luke Hancock decided to transfer when his George Mason coach ‘jumped’ to take on the head coaching job at University of Miami. Courageously, after considering multiple schools and two of them were in his home state, Hancock agreed that the University of Louisville was his next step. Within just a few months, his teammates named him captain even though he sat out as a ‘redshirt’ during the 2011-2012 season.  Within less than two years of his transfer (change), he was deep in the NCAA tournament assuming a key role after a teammate fell due to a broken leg. And who was the one who calmed Kevin Ware as he laid on the sideline with a broken leg? Luke Hancock was there, fully present during the ‘breaking point’, looking directly in to his teammate’s eyes. Just a week later, Hancock came off the bench and led the Louisville Cardinals in not one, but two comebacks to win the NCAA title. Hancock’s ability to be courageous, calm, and lead are truly unique. The NCAA voters agreed, and awarded him the NCAA Final Four’s Most Outstanding Player award.

Come On Aussies. In July 2011, the #1 golfer in the world released his caddie, Steve Williams.  And a younger but highly talented golfer from Australia, Adam Scott, had the amazing courage to quickly hire the best caddie in golf, Williams. At that point, Scott hadn’t won a major championship on the PGA Tour. But most in the sport quickly realized that the elusive major was now within reach. Although Scott was close (he gave up a four-stroke lead in the 2012 British Open), he came back stronger and won the 2013 Masters in fabulous style (sinking a birdie putt in the second playoff hole against a previous Masters winner). Again, in less than two years, Scott has reached the pinnacle of his career in winning The Masters, all because he had the courage to change and transform.

Both of these examples remind us of how some people get ‘stuck’ due to fear of making a change, while others embrace courageous change and achieve heights that appeared to be untouchable. How are you embracing change and your future opportunities? A first few steps might be to identify where you want to go, what you want to achieve, and then identify who can help you reach your pinnacle.

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Downsizing?

Recently, I have embraced and experienced two significant transitions.  The first one was relocating from a 8,000+ square foot home in a suburb to a 1,275 square foot 2-bedroom flat in an urban arts & cultural district.  The second transition included changing jobs, from being a global leader in a Fortune 50 company with revenues of $50+billion to now leading my own small company as well as accepting a role as V.P. of Marketing in a multi-million dollar hi-tech company.

What have I noticed? Lots! Large homes are comfortable, sprawling, and friendly for entertaining.  Large multinational companies expose you to global trends, cultures, and realities every minute of a day.  However, there are definitely some other differences in going from extra, extra large to medium & small.

Lean with Increased Efficiency. Little Waste or Excess.

In the 2-bedroom flat, we utilize every inch of space in the cabinets, under beds, on the walls, in the closets, and under the sinks.  In my own company, my overhead is essential and lean: a new laptop, iPhone, and printer, as well as internet service and file folders.  Notice I didn’t mention a desk, a land line, an office chair, or an office.  In the fast growing hi-tech company, everyone is using free Internet communication tools.  For example, they use Skype to instant message other employees, they listen to their favorite music via Pandora to help themselves stay focused in the narrow confines of their office space, leverage Yammer for internal employee networking and social updates, and Google+ Hangouts is utilized for video conferencing when  multiple participants and locations are necessary.  Very few employees have offices; most are working in pods, completely focused on working with each other to nail deadlines for the client’s success.

Priorities are a Priority. Less is More.

When we relocated to the smaller flat, we prioritized and shipped only what we really needed. That included just two beds; one set of silverware, plates, towels, and pans; one living area; and one dining area.  What’s the benefit? Much less to clean and more time available in the evening to relax and on the weekend to enjoy family and friends.  In my coaching & consulting business, invoices are issued as soon as services are provided.  In my first couple weeks at the hi-tech company, the founders quickly decided to provide incentives to salesmen to close deals by year end, implemented an in-depth algorithm to ensure pricing was pristinely matched for new markets being targeted in 2012, and made expense cuts in just one meeting after reviewing financials for the month.

Try it, You Might Like It.

I had an incredible 25 years at a Fortune 50 company;  however, I have never looked back since leaving in March 2011.  The feeling of freedom to move more quickly on my client’s behalf, with agility and energy, is liberating. Results can happen quickly, and no matter whether they are good or bad results, you KNOW the result. In the small flat, we lock the door and walk to close-by restaurants and shopping, and utilize the incredible paved trail just steps away.  The fast growing hi-tech company has energy and focus like I’ve never seen. Clients and results are everyone’s tireless passion. And it’s fun!

Repack Your Bag.

As 2012 approaches, I am reminded of Richard Leider’s book, “Repacking Your Bags: Lighten Your Load for the Rest of Your Life.” Leider gives examples of how to annually review and purposefully repack what you are carrying and doing what you really want to be doing.  It’s working for me. This feeling of energy I get from the two transitions (from XXL to medium and small) is exhilarating and renewing. How about you? What is too big in your life? How can you benefit from making it small?  What waste can you eliminate? How can you become more agile? What will you purposefully keep & maintain from XXL? I want to encourage you to embrace transition and change. You might be surprised how quick you can move and expand beyond your own expectations.